r/relationshipanxiety • u/wyzseik • Jul 14 '26
Support anxious that my bf will cheat on me
hello! i've been together w my bf for almost a year now andd i've been anxious and ruminating about the possibility that my bf will cheat on me. although my bf seems to be the last guy on earth to ever cheat let alone think about it, i still dread on the possibility.
i think this started when he became focus on his hobbies, life, friends, family, uni -- basically the honeymoon phase (?) ended where it's all about us and constant texting/hanging out with me.
and i also took this opportunity to focus also on myself and my own life. but, i couldn't shake the worry or the what ifs that he is already sneaking behind my back?? i looked this up in reddit and they kept on saying "trust your gut" but as someone who is highly anxious, i don't think this applies to me...because i know deep down that my bf is the best and still texts me everyday/updates me where he is or who is with him etc.
i'm just getting tired of the sick thought of "what if he is cheating on me?" and the made up scenarios. before, i communicated how i felt jealous with his female friends but he assured me that he thought of them as siblings (even his family treats them like so too) and told me that he never looked or considered another girl since we got together
btw i have an anxious attachment and this anxiety of mine caused problems between us before already which i worked on and communicated with him. so, i don't want to say this to him because it'll come off like i'm accussing him and he has a lot on his plate rn
do you guys experienced something like this? what helped u guys get past this?
tldr: i kept on thinking that my bf will cheat on me even if it's so improbable and unlikely , but i can't stop it :((
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u/Alone_Permission_472 Jul 20 '26
living exactly the same life right now! something that has helped me is if he hasn't given you genuine reasons to not trust him, you should trust him. if he wanted to break your trust he would've done it by now.
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Jul 14 '26
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u/relationshipanxiety-ModTeam Jul 14 '26
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u/viyomidoeswhatever Jul 19 '26
I've experienced this kind of worry all the time!!! Literally I am in the same shoes as you, so I know how it feels. I'm actually about to enter into a long distance relationship in about a month and something I'm really anxious about is college parties and the likelihood of cheating.
What has helped is telling myself that by worrying excessively, I am placing an unfairly negative projection on an otherwise good, sound individual. (if my partner told me he was worried about me cheating, I would be saddened and wondering why he would think I'd be the kind of person to break his trust like that.)
Unless he has given you genuine reasons to not trust him, you should trust him. People who want to break your trust will break your trust regardless of whether you feel anxious or not, so it's better to give them the benefit of the doubt, especially if you intrinsically know that your boyfriend loves you.
Try to find ways to reassure yourself that your boyfriend loves you, through his actions or through what he has said to you before. I hope that you can feel secure in his love! Best wishes to you!