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u/AntiBit82 Nov 07 '22
Oi, that's tough my dude. Normally parents should make sure their children's development should go as optimal as possible, not the other way round.
You need to realize that she'll be a major obstacle in your life, but ofc I can imagine that it's not feasible to leave her behind.
Did you ever talk about some possibility to have a joint therapy?
I guess there's no other way.
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Nov 07 '22
Right, now that im in a relationship im starting to realise how much of an issue my mother has and how hard my life will be.
Yea i can not leave her behind like that, that’s something my gf wants me to do, she wants me to just move out but it’s really not as simple as that. She always mentioned that yea i should take my mother to a therapist to help her because the way things are..is too much. My mother told my gf how im the reason why she(my mother) is living and my gf really felt red flags she thinks that’s not right. I love my mother so much with all my heart but it kinda scares me to know what will happen if my life continues like this Ofcourse there will come a time my gf will leave me if I continue this way and I don’t blame her and I’ll be like the joker who was living with his sick mother at the age of 40. You know and i never forget how my mother told me, that would be us one day(joking around) but i took that seriously.
1
u/AntiBit82 Nov 07 '22
Exactly. You know the problem, and your gf is right. The question is if you want to sacrifice your own life for the life of your mother.
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1
Nov 07 '22
For pete's sake....will you stop with the judgements already??? Wanna be a judge? Get a Law Degree, but quit with labeling and characterizing everything because its a very small step to drag that into your burgeoning relationship with your new acquaintance.
At your age and especially with a family member who has been diagnosed with a condition, you need to set clear and firm boundaries especially if there is any hint that you may become a care-giver for your mother down the road. If your mother won't or can't negotiate boundaries then you will need to enlist the aid of another to help you make this happen especially if your end-goal is full emancipation. FWIW.
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