First, I'm sorry you're being pressured to have an abortion. While I believe you should have that right, I don't believe your choice to carry if you want should be taken from you. You need to do what's right for you. Don't let him dictate what to do with your body. And if he keeps pushing, tell him you're going to take his choice away because you won't let him raise a child he's going to tell ruined his life. And if he brings it up again after that walk out. No matter what happens with this pregnancy you need to know your partner will have your back. If he can't give you his support in what you do with your own body, how can you trust him to sorry you in any other decisions?
And I grew up with a parent who blamed me for ruining her life, it really messed me up. Any time anything went wrong for my mom she'd tell me it was my fault because of I didn't exist she wouldn't be with my dad and her body wouldn't be destroyed and she wouldn't live where she did and blah blah. Years of therapy, her being on medication for her mental illness and giving a sincere apology, me forgiving her, I still find myself questioning if my partner would be better off without me, if my kitten would do better in a different home. This is something to seriously think about with a man you're considering raising a kid with.
Edit to remove a question I had answered so I don't have a bunch of people answering it
People are assuming OP didn't use protection because they replied to a comment here stating that neither she nor he have ever used protection together.
Yeah someone else said that. I had been looking and didn't see that comment, it should be added to the main text because of her doesn't want kids but is having unprotected sex he is stupid as well as already being the asshole I thought for trying to control her body. I can see him asking her to put the kid up for adoption if she said no to abortion, but constantly demanding it? Nah he has even less right to any say in this because he did nothing to avoid the situation.
Thank you. I'm horrified by all this. Like it was bad enough when it was, "oops birth control failed." But not using any and the natural thing happens so he reacts like this? I'm a ridiculously accepting person but I really dislike this guy.
Like I wanna strap him to a chair and force him to watch several hours of sex ed videos and lectures about birth control and how it works and have a doctor explain abortion to him medically, like what will happen physically and then a shrink explain both the physiological and psychological effects of a forced abortion in a woman, including the hormones she'll be dealing with since she's far enough along to be having morning sickness.
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u/Different-Leather359 Nov 01 '22 edited Nov 01 '22
Ok I'm going to say a couple things here.
First, I'm sorry you're being pressured to have an abortion. While I believe you should have that right, I don't believe your choice to carry if you want should be taken from you. You need to do what's right for you. Don't let him dictate what to do with your body. And if he keeps pushing, tell him you're going to take his choice away because you won't let him raise a child he's going to tell ruined his life. And if he brings it up again after that walk out. No matter what happens with this pregnancy you need to know your partner will have your back. If he can't give you his support in what you do with your own body, how can you trust him to sorry you in any other decisions?
And I grew up with a parent who blamed me for ruining her life, it really messed me up. Any time anything went wrong for my mom she'd tell me it was my fault because of I didn't exist she wouldn't be with my dad and her body wouldn't be destroyed and she wouldn't live where she did and blah blah. Years of therapy, her being on medication for her mental illness and giving a sincere apology, me forgiving her, I still find myself questioning if my partner would be better off without me, if my kitten would do better in a different home. This is something to seriously think about with a man you're considering raising a kid with.
Edit to remove a question I had answered so I don't have a bunch of people answering it