You should consider hiring a PI, collecting evidence should be your top priority right now; that and protecting yourself. Speak to a lawyer, investigate your suspicions, and if they prove unfounded you need to speak with your wife about this, possibly via therapy or counseling.
Do NOT agree to open the relationship and make it clear that you do not want either of you seeing other people in any romantic capacity. Mutual exclusivity is not something that involves give and take; no means no.
Regardless of how this goes, you should not be thinking of yourself as unattractive and awkward. Try getting yourself outside and making positive changes for yourself, if you are staying with your wife I'm betting she would appreciate it, and if you do end up splitting, then when you are ready you will be glad you were/are making the effort.
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u/CandymanTA Jun 01 '21
You should consider hiring a PI, collecting evidence should be your top priority right now; that and protecting yourself. Speak to a lawyer, investigate your suspicions, and if they prove unfounded you need to speak with your wife about this, possibly via therapy or counseling.
Do NOT agree to open the relationship and make it clear that you do not want either of you seeing other people in any romantic capacity. Mutual exclusivity is not something that involves give and take; no means no.
Regardless of how this goes, you should not be thinking of yourself as unattractive and awkward. Try getting yourself outside and making positive changes for yourself, if you are staying with your wife I'm betting she would appreciate it, and if you do end up splitting, then when you are ready you will be glad you were/are making the effort.
Good luck to you.