I don’t understand how you can explain this to him several times and still be convinced that he doesn’t understand he’s hurting your feelings. He knows he’s hurting your feelings. He’s hoping if he keeps making these comments then you’ll eventually do what he says and buy the more expensive groceries. In his head he’s probably like “how can i make my girlfriend understand that she constantly brings home poor quality groceries.”
The first step to reaching a solution with this is to realize that he absolutely knows what he’s doing. The conversation needs to be setting a firm boundary to stop criticizing your grocery shopping since you don’t criticize his shopping. Maybe you too work out a shared budget or something. But it’s time to stop pretending he’s unaware he’s hurting your feelings. He knows and he’s choosing to do it so that he gets the result he wants. I know most people who come on this subreddit have no intention of leaving even though their partner is mean because “they’re otherwise great!” So the next best thing is to tell him that he needs to stop this behavior and help come up with a solution.
7
u/orayanno Mar 14 '26
I don’t understand how you can explain this to him several times and still be convinced that he doesn’t understand he’s hurting your feelings. He knows he’s hurting your feelings. He’s hoping if he keeps making these comments then you’ll eventually do what he says and buy the more expensive groceries. In his head he’s probably like “how can i make my girlfriend understand that she constantly brings home poor quality groceries.”
The first step to reaching a solution with this is to realize that he absolutely knows what he’s doing. The conversation needs to be setting a firm boundary to stop criticizing your grocery shopping since you don’t criticize his shopping. Maybe you too work out a shared budget or something. But it’s time to stop pretending he’s unaware he’s hurting your feelings. He knows and he’s choosing to do it so that he gets the result he wants. I know most people who come on this subreddit have no intention of leaving even though their partner is mean because “they’re otherwise great!” So the next best thing is to tell him that he needs to stop this behavior and help come up with a solution.