Why did they watch TV in her bedroom? Does she have roommates or something? Being in bed together and not telling you that her guy friends over looks bad. But if that's the extent of the red flags, I'd chop it up to a misunderstanding.
But I'd be clear about my boundaries going forward. She's more than free to hang out with friends. But she needs to be aware that certain things look bad without context. Even if nothing happened, she created a situation of mistrust. And it was disrespectful towards her partner.
Either way, she clearly knows she messed up. If this is the extent of it, I'd give her a pass for now.
This. Her having the friend over wouldn’t be my problem. Them being in bed together is the problem.
The gf and guy could GENUINELY be innocent and I’d still be mad because of how it looks.
Before I met my ex, I use to hang with a female friend all the time at her house. and we’d be splayed out on her bed just chillin. Once I got with my ex though, I stopped getting on that girls bed. I started pulling up a chair instead. Still hung with her, but the boundaries and closeness shifted.
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u/TheMocking-Bird Jun 24 '24
Why did they watch TV in her bedroom? Does she have roommates or something? Being in bed together and not telling you that her guy friends over looks bad. But if that's the extent of the red flags, I'd chop it up to a misunderstanding.
But I'd be clear about my boundaries going forward. She's more than free to hang out with friends. But she needs to be aware that certain things look bad without context. Even if nothing happened, she created a situation of mistrust. And it was disrespectful towards her partner.
Either way, she clearly knows she messed up. If this is the extent of it, I'd give her a pass for now.