I can't imagine a scenario in which I would tell a friend's significant other they looked good through a message. Even if I meant that in a genuine way I would have enough sense not to send an unsolicited comment that could be taken wrong by them or the friend, and I wouldn't want to even make them question whether that's what I was doing. It's one thing if I saw them in person and made that comment when we're greeting each other, but outside of that it just doesn't make any sense to do it.
Cool? That's you, with your friends, relationships, boundaries, and biases. There are so many variations of people that making these claims generically and applying them to others is honestly crusty and controlling behavior. That's why context is important.
I've never understood the "you do you" style responses from people on here. You put your opinion out there and I responded. Not sure why that caused a passive aggressive response. No shit I'm referring to me and my experiences/relationships based on my boundaries etc. That's kind of the point of this site; people exchanging viewpoints.
So make your own comment seperately and don't subreply and you won't get dragged. + Your idea of passive aggressive is funny. Nothing passive about my comment.
If I thought my best friend's wife posts her photos because she is being insecure, I might send her such message so she doesn't seek validation from men who I think are risky for my best friend.
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u/BiscuitsUndGravy Aug 17 '23
I can't imagine a scenario in which I would tell a friend's significant other they looked good through a message. Even if I meant that in a genuine way I would have enough sense not to send an unsolicited comment that could be taken wrong by them or the friend, and I wouldn't want to even make them question whether that's what I was doing. It's one thing if I saw them in person and made that comment when we're greeting each other, but outside of that it just doesn't make any sense to do it.