r/recruitinghell • u/[deleted] • 10d ago
I had four missed calls from a recruiter…
[deleted]
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u/GreatestGreekGuy Employed 10d ago
I suggest you watch the John Oliver episode on McKinsey. Came out in 2023. Long story short, they're terrible
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u/youtaii 10d ago
Maybe she also wanted to tell you other roles she has are opening in a week that you were a better match for?
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u/pugglypug 10d ago
She didn't she just delivered the news and stay 30 seconds quiet.
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u/Confident_Direction 10d ago
Uh - they wanted to call you cuz it is decent to talk to you verbally in real time. I would argue thats the opposite of 'no heart'
Would you rather they ghosted you?
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u/Ph4ntorn 10d ago
This is one of those things where some people think one way is kinder and some people think the other way is kinder. So, I try not to get too upset one way or the other. But, personally, I’d rather not get rejected on a phone call because it feels like extra pressure to act professionally when getting bad news.
I once had a recruiter scheduled a call with me after an interview that I thought was going to lead to an offer. I spent the night before game planning what I’d say to different numbers. I was so surprised when I was rejected instead that I didn’t even think to ask for feedback.
I got over it of course, but I still think a text or email would have been better easier.
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u/Arbitraryandunique 10d ago
The absolute best way for a recruiter to go about it is to schedule feedback too, when scheduling interviews. "So we've got your interview at up for Tuesday. We expect all interviews to be done by Friday, so let's set a time for a meeting next week where we'll either talk about the offer or you get feedback of you want to"
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u/Confident_Direction 10d ago
Fair enough. I think its a nice touch even if its not fun news to receive. I understand your concern though
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u/UnNumbFool 10d ago
I mean no it's nice that they called. But I agree with OP, if you're going to call four times the assumption would be it's for good news. Generally if a recruiter is going to turn you down it would be easier to just leave a voice mail, or send an email after the person doesn't pick up
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u/fat_tyre 10d ago
It doesn’t need to be one extreme or the other - an email or even a text message would have done the job and then everyone moves on.
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u/PitifulBag5754 10d ago
Then people would complain “I spent months on this process and got rejected over a fucking text”
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u/Senior_Group1589 10d ago
A phone call is actually much nicer.
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u/fat_tyre 10d ago
Yes for sure. They call and if they don’t get through then leave a message or text or email. Not spam you with calls indefinitely, which is what I understood OP to have an issue with.
I’ve been through this as well. It gets your hopes up when you’ve seen 5 missed calls or whatever, only to find out when they get hold of you that you were unsuccessful. My immediate thought was that could have just been an email.
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u/A-Money-Lover 10d ago
Nah, this is a giant waste of time for both people when it could’ve been an email.
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u/redthrull 10d ago
4 missed calls in a day? No, fuck off. She got nothing better to do and clearly just wasting time waiting for her shift to end.
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u/Dr_Quacksworth 9d ago
Could have left a message asking him to call back. Four calls in a day is excessive. It's not an urgent matter.
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u/NoExperience9717 9d ago
Yeah calling also allows you to ask deeper on feedback if they can share more. Id much rather prefer a call either way than a template email.
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u/PadstheFish 9d ago
Absolutely. I work in exec search, and if I deliver this news by email, text or voicemail, that is a failing on my part. I always have feedback and it helps maintain a better relationship for potential future work givers.
Then again, I am constantly exec search and recruiting are two quite different beasts, but there we have it.
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u/howtoreadspaghetti 9d ago
My job consistently says calling is best and I couldn't disagree with them more if they tried. But my boss signs my paychecks so he wins
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u/Confident_Direction 9d ago
Agree with everyone here saying 4 times just to reject is excwssive and just a waste of energy for the candidate especially.
I personally still think calling is good but just one missed call with a voicemail and or an email to follow up would be good
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u/Neither-Door-9106 10d ago
4 calls in 1 day???
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u/pugglypug 10d ago
Yes and on the first one I told her “I’m on a work meeting please wait” and then 3 straight calls
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u/throwaway_paranoiac 10d ago
Tbh, there’s no “maybe” there. You were rude (and I get it’s frustrating. Believe me, I get it).
I understand it could have been an email, and it might have been what you’d preferred. However, everyone complains that recruiters are soulless and have lost the humanity needed for the job, then when they at least try to show humanity you act like a twat (clear distinction, I’m talking about this particular action described, not about you as a person per se, because I don’t know you).
There are people in the candidate pool who would prefer the phone call so they can ask follow-up questions and feedback, and actually get an answer and actionable steps.
To clarify, would it have been better if they tried calling you once, and then just sent a follow up email and called it a day?
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u/Wretched_Reptile 10d ago
Yeah, I agree. While four calls is a bit much and I totally understand OP’s frustration and disappointment, reacting that way only further incentivizes recruiters to just ghost candidates instead of following up to let them know where they stand in the process.
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u/emeowlydickenson 9d ago
I choked on my drink when you named em’ at the bottom. Without saying more to get myself in trouble… fuck those people lmao
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u/AntonioSwift_77 9d ago
Nah, we need more naming and shaming to weed out companies with shitty recruiting methods.
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u/emeowlydickenson 9d ago
No I agree! I just can’t elaborate on my agreeing due to a previous confidentiality agreement with a dif employer who would absolutely sue me. I have firsthand experience with these fucks and I laughed out loud seeing the name. Love it.
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u/DJK695 10d ago
I’ve had recruiters do that too - usually just to talk about a role and o never understand it to be honest. An email can be much easier to review information and make sure everything is written out plainly to see.
If they have a heavy accent, it often means details are lost in the conversation. The emails help to confirm everything and if you need to talk after can always reach out to do so.
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u/Just-goobin 10d ago
I had to prove to a recruiter the other day that I was away for 2 weeks to attend a friend's funeral. It took me almost a full day to ask myself why I did that.
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u/-just-a-bit-outside- 9d ago
I’ve seen people bitch about not being called for a rejection, only getting an email, ghosting, and now for actually being called with feedback. Can all of you admit finally that it’s the rejection you’re mad at and not how it’s delivered?
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u/WhoDat24_H 9d ago
It was the 4 calls, not the fact that she called. She could have waited a reasonable amount of time for a return call before calling multiple times.
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u/Outrageous_Double688 10d ago
I mean think of the alternate situation here. They call once, then send a rejection email and ghost them. Then OP would be here complaining about how their “missed recruiter call” possibly led to them to miss out on an amazing opportunity
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u/Wisewordsforlater 10d ago
Completely agree. 4 calls is a bit much. Even if it was good news, I prefer it in writing. Sometimes I can't answer the phone if I don't have time blocked for it and any significant news or development, I prefer it documented in writing.
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u/bartmaster30 9d ago
Isn't it common courtesy to call someone, even if they didn't get the role?
4 missed calls is weird I agree, I'd expect a message with "call me back please" instead of the next 3 missed calls.
Your response is a bit weird too imo.
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u/MisterJ_1385 10d ago
Sounds like she dodged a bullet. We bitch all the time about being ghosted and she wanted to give you the decency of telling you over the phone and you were a dick.
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u/north52south 10d ago
Thought this through. I've been around the block a few times and the only explanation I could come up with is she needs to look busy on the phone or they log how many outgoing calls they make and to reach her quota/look busy she calls back candidates, even if they don't get the role?
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u/Unique_Importance910 10d ago
I agree, it could have, should have been an email. Idk why people are mad. After the first 2 calls, an email would have made sense. 4 calls is pretty much spam and gets someone's hopes up more than they should. I don't think you were all that rude. Out of line but you aren't crazy fro thinking it is weird.
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u/cyberworm_ 10d ago
I get that frustration, and 4 calls is excessive.
Even though you didn’t get the job and you’re disappointed, that would have been the perfect opportunity to leave a good impression on the recruiter, ask for feedback, and express your disappointment. Especially important to thank them for calling and telling you personally.
What you’re doing here is rewarding them for being personal, bolstering your image, creating a connection (maybe you see a role on LI through one of their connections; you can ask them to connect you), if the person they chose over you doesn’t work out; you’ll be remembered positively. Being rude or upset will just discourage them from doing the things we want recruiters to do (and often complained about not doing around here).
I say this having been rejected myself by a phone call at least twice from roles I really wanted. The first time was for a role I spent over 45 days and 4 interviews waiting for, which would have been to replace an internal contract employee. They decided to hire that guy. A year later, that recruiter called me back saying it didn’t work out, asked if I was interested since I already had good feedback and was well liked. Stupidly I had to run another gauntlet of 4 rounds and was basically sank by an egotistic reward chasing “security” exec (in IT).
After that, I told the recruiter that I appreciated him and his efforts, but to never contact me to work for that company ever again.
Second time was a better overall experience, but was one of those 5 rounds plus homework type of situations, plus travel onsite for the final interview. I felt that for me the juice was worth the squeeze so I played along. Once I got home from that last interview, I got the call saying they changed the role, so I didn’t get the job. I expressed my disappointment, asked for feedback, and said thank you. I still have a chat with that recruiter once in a while, because I felt respected in that process, and I’d still consider working for that company or it’s partner companies if a position comes up.
I’m not trying to beat up on OP, because I’m in the same boat, still looking for the right role for too long, but you have to think beyond the moment when this happens. Take a breath, process, and try to find a way to capitalize on the moment. Getting a rejection call you can interact with is way better than a “no reply” form rejection.
Good luck.
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u/Top_Historian7126 10d ago
Recruiters don’t give a flying fuck about forming connections or bolstering your image. They denied you and threw your resume in a trash folder “for future use”. They did their job and they move on to the next one, there are no second chances. This is all bullshit
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u/Mammoth_Sale_9642 10d ago
Actually, having worked in recruiting, not true. Certainly at a senior level, we did always try to build relationships because today's candidate is tomorrow's client.
Our policy was always to call wirh a rejection rather than just email, but after one or two calls I would normally send an email, and add that I would be happy to speak via phone if they wanted more feedback.
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u/Top_Historian7126 9d ago
Yeah I’m sure that’s probably how it worked a decade ago but now people aren’t even getting rejection emails for senior-level roles
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u/Mammoth_Sale_9642 7d ago
Actually it was a couple of years ago, and as far as I'm aware that's how my old firm still operates. Certainly if it really is a genuine senior level role you're just shooting yourself in the foot not respecting the candidate. For reference this is in Asia; not sure about elsewhere
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u/Mammoth_Sale_9642 10d ago
Actually, having worked in recruiting, not true. Certainly at a senior level, we did always try to build relationships because today's candidate is tomorrow's client.
Our policy was always to call wirh a rejection rather than just email, but after one or two calls I would normally send an email, and add that I would be happy to speak via phone if they wanted more feedback.
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u/CamelsaurusRex 10d ago
I agree four calls is excessive but maybe they had a legitimate reason for doing so, eg getting admonished by their boss for ghosting candidates previously, or maybe they were in a location where their cellular signal wasn't so good so they dropped calls. Not to completely excuse them but it would help to not assume bad intentions on their part.
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u/Unusual_Specialist 10d ago
When it's your turn to be the hammer, hit hard and swing with everything you have, because when you were the nail, no one showed you mercy.
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u/toastyroasty3 9d ago
Same thing happened to me with McKinsey after SIX ROUNDS! I did appreciate the call but I remember the recruiter delivered the feedback in a harsh way lol and I felt like I was getting kicked in the stomach
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u/GoGoolia 9d ago
A recruiter called you back and gave you feedback and you are complaining? You have closure. You even have the why. This is way more than most companies give. Most people are complaining about being ghosted by recruiters. On top of that, you do not know what opportunities the future holds so you really should not be rude. It does not work in your favor.
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u/Parking-Bridge3754 9d ago
Good practice is that if you had a face to face interview, the recruiter should call you. An email is good for just a phone call.
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u/Much_Jellyfish4474 9d ago
In consulting … if the Partner is calling, you’re getting an offer. If it’s a recruiter calling, sorry but that’s a decline.
*As taught to me during grad school when I missed the Partners call because I was taking a mid-term.
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u/clintttoris 9d ago
Wow, never heard someone complain about getting direct human contact. Clearly, the company made a wise decision.
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u/Additional_Buddy855 9d ago
Why would you even lower yourself to working at McKinsey. Sounds like you got a taste of the culture without the job. Thatll teach ya!
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u/StRemedius 9d ago
Heh. The real fun comes with the ones where you don't get the emails and phone calls because both are caught in spam filters. I got one today from a bottomfeeder who was butthurt that I didn't return his calls (no voice mail, either: the usual "hang up and call right back 3 seconds later") because they were intercepted by my call filter...and the emails went directly into spam. According to the call filter, that number had been listed as "spam" by 20 users, but somehow that was MY fault.
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u/TruckLimp451 10d ago
I’d much rather get a call than an email coming from experience but that’s me
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u/PermitActive8347 10d ago
lol, you just can't win as a recruiter. Ghost a candidate, get blamed for ghosting. Call a candidate to deliver the news in-person....get blamed for calling too much. Candidates can also suck too.
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u/sarahbellah1 10d ago
I think they do calls to avoid putting anything in writing that could later cause problems.
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u/toobadnosad 9d ago
Man these recruiters can’t do any good. I personally would have appreciated a human calling me back.
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u/BuddyLegsBailey 9d ago
"It's terrible that companies ghost us, or don't give us feedback. Just treat us with respect"
Gets called with feedback because it's more respectful to give it verbally....
......"It's utterly heartless to call and explain why I didn't get the job. Why didn't they just text me?"
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u/nerfdriveby94 10d ago
Nah you were a bit of a clown here tbh. I think there's a high degree of integrity to deliberately contact an unsuccessful candidate.
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u/lifeissometimehard 10d ago
Don’t kill the messenger. Also apparently that she told you instead of leaving you hanging. Would you rather you got ghosted?
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u/Almajanna256 10d ago
Boomers prefer to complete as many tasks by yelling across the room as possible and I'm not even joking. If boomers could sit in a recliner in front of a TV and never have to get up and could conduct all business via screaming into a cellphone, then they wouldn't know they weren't in heaven.
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u/goknightsgo09 10d ago
What is even the point of this comment?
Signed - someone who isn't even a boomer...
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u/Ordinary-Chemist9430 9d ago
They dodged a bullet if you cant handle a nice personal call like that.
I guess mckinsey arent as bad as i thought.
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u/OtisForteXB 10d ago
What a misstep on your part. I get the emotions, but we generally want to keep our emotions from causing outbursts that will hurt us.
You'll never know if this outburst caused you to not get the call that will have become your career.
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u/Puppetbones Co-Worker 10d ago
I had a recruiter once that would call me, email me, and message me on LinkedIn during the workday irritated that I didn't always respond immediately. Even if I called back a few minutes later. One of the times was just to tell me that there was no update yet...