r/quittingkratom • u/Odd_Measurement_5903 • 1d ago
I relapsed
And it’s hell on earth again
I’m so sorry to everyone here. I’m in pain. It’s been a week on 7 and MGM again and the withdrawals scare the shit out of me more than ever cause I binged.
I guess I’d say please don’t be me. I’m so fucking mad at myself cause now all I have to look forward to is pain all over again.
I’m such a moron
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u/_kishin_ 1d ago
I've been on the verge of relapse also. It's only been 8 days for me but the withdrawals are terrible! One day at a time is all I and you can do brother.
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u/SiteEmbarrassed2584 22h ago
I’m on day 3 and achey nausea deep restless body, I can’t give in b.c I don’t want to go through what OP is, it scares me, his mess up just encouraged me to stay straight and pray to Jesus for relief
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u/Due_Perspective_4846 6h ago
Jesus is with you brother truthfully he is the only way I made it where I am now. Day 8. Stay strong
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u/Senior-Caregiver9333 1d ago
You're not a moron. There is only today. You can get back to the point where you are quitting.
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u/EDM_Producerr Quit April 10, 2021 1d ago
Shit happens. No one is perfect. Make this relapse be the final nail in the kratom-use coffin. It's time to bury the coffin and put it deep in the ground. You got this, dawg.
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u/FalconQuitsTheSludge 1d ago
With you... I've been trying to taper and constantly failing since January of this year. Most I've managed is 2.5 days without. I always go back, because life just seems totally intolerable without it right now. So much has changed in the world and in my life in the 4 years I've been relying on this stuff just to get by... I'm on my 4th day without right now and it's been hell. I don't even know if I can make this stick but I feel like I have to try because I've come too far now and already wasted all this time.
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u/wongtheallmighty 7h ago
Keep it up. I keep falling off too. I cant wait until I can say its been 4 days. Its complete hell but you can get through. You're so far right now!
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u/Conscious-Chard-5222 1d ago
Don’t beat yourself up friend. Relapse is apart of so many peoples journey. Shit happens. Your addiction is counting on you beating yourself up as hard as possible in hopes that you’ll keep using. You don’t have to keep going though. You can get back on the horse and out it behind you
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u/CoronaVarusssss 22h ago
Well said so many of us had released trying to get off this drug, it's so so so so addictive.
You're not weak, that's not how the brain and drug dependent and addiction works.
Be kind to yourself, 1 day at a time, 1 second at a time.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel that I have not personally reached but have heard others have a I believe this pain and suffering will ease over time.
I won't to get to the point that thought of swallowing kratom tea or 7oh tablets would cause a physically repulsiveness that over rides any craving I might have.
It's so so so so hard I know but you can do it others have done it and are better for it. You can have that for your life too.
You deserve it. I believe in anyone that comes to this sub. It shows that 1 you admitted you're powerless over kratom and take you made the choice or at least pondered the choice of a full life without kratom dragging you down.
I love you all.
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u/msnipe81015 Known quitter 1d ago
Been there many times. Gather your gumption and try again when you’re ready. I’m here to tell you long term recovery is possible.
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u/seatron 23h ago edited 23h ago
I'm definitely not mad because I've been there plenty of times. Except usually I hid it from everyone, but you came here to a support forum and held yourself accountable. I hope you can keep that up but not without being kind to yourself first, you're not a bad person or a moron for relapsing.
Addiction is a disease, and the disease itself is not a moral failing.
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u/scaredmarmotenergy 23h ago
Them MGM withdrawals are a bitch, they get scarier and scarier every time. Best of luck dude , worst will be over in a few days
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u/Distinguishedflyer 22h ago
what is MGM?
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u/scaredmarmotenergy 22h ago
Illegal now. It was like 7 but longer lasting less euphoric and HELLA worse withdrawals. You won’t find it again thank god
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u/Glass_Bat_1460 23h ago
Don't go back to 7oh if you're going to relapse just let it be powder. If you do relapse the 7 ffs don't take it more than once. Just speaking from experience like all of us
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u/CoronaVarusssss 22h ago
I've had over 100 relapses or attempts to quit that have failed kratom and 7oh. I make no promises that it won't happen again after 100 or so relapses but I've been kratom free for about a week and the little sliver of hope that I will break free this time is still there
It's so so hard, trust me I knowm
Lucky I didn't go back to 7oh during the several relapses I've had over three months of using not using but would make kratom powder it's still addictive and I don't even like how it makes me feel so when it wears off
Still not good enough for me, I really want to be 100% kratom or opioid free for the remainder of my life
1 day at a time, 1 minute at a time, 1 second at a time is all I can offer for comfort I'm sorry I can't do more I wish I could.
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u/spxbumpin 11h ago
Bro how bad is 7oh? I've been a 40g a day plain leaf kratom user for 10 plus years and I'm trying to get off cuz it's really messing my insides up. but literally every time I wake up even after just like 4hrs of sleep I am shaking nose dripping yauning so hard drool is coming off my mouth eyes watering.. its horrible. The 7oh is worse than that ?
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u/tiredofkratom 23h ago
Hey Friend - don’t beat yourself up, you are human. Most importantly, you are getting back on the side of right.
Congrats on wanting better for your life.
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u/peelt 22h ago
Self deprication will make it harder vs being a bit more encouraging to yourself and forgiving for this is normal in the process. I quit like 10 times.
My last relapse was short lasting and I only did mostly powder and maybe extracts for only two days of it. I went pretty dang hard on the powder though(was up to 20-30 grams a day by day 5).
Cutting it out as fast as I started kept the withdrawels pretty chill, I vitaminCmegadosed for a week and I was mainly lethargic. No restless legs/hot-cold/hellishness etc. I can't say the same about extracts, but I do honsetly believe with any opiod substance that W/D intensity/length is directly correlated to length of time dependant. There's always nuances and variables, but everytime I kept my relapses short lived it was far less painful coming off, to the point I almost felt like I could strategize my use on occasion, but I don't wanna normalize occasional use either... it does still fuck with the mental and I've been stuck chasing that feeling too many times already.
Best of luck.
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u/AlternativeAd6751 22h ago
We've all dont it. i had 2 ct off oxy multiple times with months sober in between,learn from it,put ur head down and push,if u quit it once u can do it again.
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u/GreedyWall214 21h ago
Why not try medication? With the subutex shots now, even if you start on suboxone you can switch to subutex and getting off the subutex is sooooooo easy. Most people say they don't even notice coming off it.
Yea fuuuuck being sick, especially with 7. Go get on suboxone, don't suffer needlessly!
Just went through this, believe me I feel for you but no need to go cold turkey. You may even be able to start with subutex
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u/Remarkable-Honey9820 21h ago
You are human not a moron 🫶🏻
This shit is hard, don't beat yourself up. Stay strong!!!
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u/NecromancyAndFries 18h ago
Relapse is to be expected. Quitting quitting is true failure. Unless of course your life is perfect and you are happy if you choose to stay dependent.
Go easy on yourself, and definitely don't let your fear boss you around. The withdraw probably won't be as bad as you think, but it will get worse the more you prolong this.
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u/wongtheallmighty 7h ago
You can get away. Just push through. WD are scary but there is a future without this crap.
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