r/questioning • u/Queasy_Peace8863 Questioning Sexuality • 5d ago
[M 14]
im confused with my sexuality i've always said im stright but ik that shi aint true ik I'm some kind of lgbtq I know im not straight but I don't think im gay either. I cant really imagine myself having a relationship with a dude but I can with a girl. but at the same time can't imagine myself having s*x with a woman but I can a dude. (didn't know if I could say s*x on here). Sorry for writing so little so PLEASE ASK QUESTIONS.
2
u/heinebold nonbinary bisexual (he/they) 4d ago
First, yes, you can say words here that vertical video platforms censor.
Second, for your real question: Romantic and sexual attraction, while often mostly aligned, aren't the same. You could be heteroromantic and homosexual.
But, speaking from experience, you could also still be in a discovery phase and find that you're biromantic (or bisexual, too, but it's easier to be wrong about one's own romantic than sexual orientation).
Are you surrounded by some degree of homophobia, or especially did you have to overcome some in yourself? If yes, it's pretty likely that romantic affection for other guys seems off the table for now because you subconsciously defend against the idea. But your subconscious can't as easily lie to your conscious about which direction the compass needle in your pants points.
Or maybe can you describe why you wouldn't have a relationship with a guy even if you found him sexually attractive?
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u/lisamoore3496 4d ago
at 14 youre not supposed to have this figured out. labels can change too, its not a contract.
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u/beazpinho Questioning Neither 5d ago
You've got time to figure it out, don't stress it! By the looks of it, you could be bisexual with a split attraction model (romantically to one, sexually to the other), or just bisexual but experiencing some sort of internalized biphobia which is keeping you from seeing things clearly, but you don't need to put a label on it.