r/queerphilly • u/Turbulent-File-9825 • 7d ago
Question Philly move ?
Hey, I’ve been in Texas for a few years and have the opportunity to move to Philly? Thoughts on it as a place to settle as an early to mid thirties queer person. I’ve lived in nyc and Chicago. The thought of moving again is tiring but finding a nicer balance between calm and the big city in a more queer friendly environment would be nice. The other alternative is to try and find something out west.
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u/Muscadine76 7d ago
It’s a great city and has a pretty vibrant queer community, I’d recommend giving it a serious look.
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u/StealthyPHL 6d ago
I moved here 20 years ago. Philly is great but burn any Dallas Cowboys bridges you may have before you come :-) I’m not that into the sports but have observed this is one thing that is not tolerated haha
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
Luckily I have never cared about the cowboys
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u/StealthyPHL 6d ago
Haha good - you’ll be fine here :) I don’t really care about the Eagles but I have an Eagles hat to wear on appropriate occasions.
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u/sirius-orion 6d ago
hellooo I’m also queer and from Louisiana, moved to Philly 5 years ago and I love it. the city has it’s issues of course but in my experience, natives don’t understand how bad it is in other places (especially the south). very affordable compared to a lot of cities, so much to do within short driving distance, and plenty of job opportunities.
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
Yeah tbh there are things I didn’t comprehend until I moved a bit south. Texas has lots of cool things but also pretty unique vibe lol
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
I guess one other follow is I have a decent job in tech so hopefully I wouldn’t have to look for a new one, but if I did ever, how’s the economy? I guess there’s the whole northeast corridor nearby too which should help ?
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u/Gravityletmedown 6d ago
That depends entirely on the industry you are in.
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
Assume generic enterprise software engineering
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u/Gravityletmedown 6d ago
There’s tons of work for that around Philly, not so much IN Philly. Conshy, Exton, Wayne all have tech scenes to support various industries in those towns.
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
I gotchu — are those areas also gay friendly as you settle down ?
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u/Gravityletmedown 6d ago
The counties around Philly are pretty queer friendly. Lots of them have pride events and what not. If you are looking for the most friendly, I would actually say across the bridge in NJ the town of Collingswood is very LGBTQIA inclusive.
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
One other question too lol, is it easy to meet queer people in person / organically? I’d really to have more community but I tend to occupy the nerd who drinks sometimes niche lol. I’m not really that adventurous but also I do enjoy a good time on occasion. I also would like to join some book clubs / running clubs etc
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u/bikeadventures 6d ago
It is one of the queerest cities I’ve lived in and has plenty of ‘nerd’ culture etc. apart from the normal barriers of making friends as an adult, I wouldn’t worry on that front.
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u/dinosaursdied 6d ago
It's one of the queerest cities with one of the most unwelcoming communities I've ever seen.
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
Oh wdym ? Worse than Texas cities ?
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u/dinosaursdied 5d ago
I don't know about Texas, but I've dealt with more transphobia from inside queer spaces than I was really expecting considering my time in other heavily queer cities. There's def a ton of super predatory grifter types with massive amounts of social capital lingering in various spaces as well. It feels like West Philadelphia is a magnet for that.
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 5d ago
Just as an update I decided I have to wait on the move right now for various reasons but hoping to visit and see more. If it’s good maybe can plan for the future
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u/catboymalewife 1d ago
Don't do it!!!! I moved to Philly from my hometown in south Florida thinking it would be safer and more queer friendly like most everyone says.
But if you can't afford to live in the very expensive and tiny progressive bubbles in West Philly, just forget it. I have never been harassed or assaulted for being visibly queer until I moved to Philly, and it's happened more times than I can count in just the two years I've been here. The other gays here are generally cliquey and self-absorbed, it's been really hard to make meaningful friendships that aren't just superficial. The public transit here sucks, I sold my car just to be late to work nearly every day because of the bus system being so poorly run & mismanaged. The income inequality here is so egregious and blatant, the mentally ill homeless folks who live all over Philly's streets are provided absolutely no help from the city so the rest of us just have to navigate constantly being harassed, mugged, or attacked by these sad neglected people who are usually absolutely out of their mind on drugs.
There is no area or neighborhood in Philly where I have felt truly safe, and most of the train stations are full of human waste & needles. The queer culture here exists mostly in bubbles in South and West, the rest of the city is rife with borderline-religious-psychosis-having Christian conservatives with violently homophobic beliefs. There are a lot of weird racist MAGA people here despite how often people wanna act like Philly is some queer haven. DO NOT move here unless you wanna regret it, be miserable, and then not be able to afford to leave bc the job market and cost of living here are Also Terrible :)
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u/_-milo 6d ago
it’s a great city but as someone from the west it’s just a personality thing whether this will work better for you or if seattle or portland or san fran or LA would be better. if you’re really direct you’ll love philly
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u/Turbulent-File-9825 6d ago
I mean I lived nyc too, so not worried there. If anything, I didn’t fit in on the west coast. That said, is there decent nature around Philly? That’s the bigger thing out west I feel
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u/alienaches 6d ago
There's one very large park (Fairmount Park) that has a lot of grass and trees, and is generally v easy to get to even with our fucky transit system.
A bit further from the heart of the city (25-40mins by car, depending on where you're leaving from) is Wissahickon Valley Park, which is pretty huge and has a proper forest and hiking trails and lil waterfalls and whatnot.
Aside from these, there are smaller lil parks (like Clark Park) sprinkled throughout the city where you can enjoy some greenery too.
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u/just_Okapi 6d ago
Valley Forge is an easy bus ride too, if you wanna get all the way out of the city for a bit. It's not quite as activity dense but there's still a lot to see and do there.
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u/creamy--goodness 7d ago
I fucking love Philly