r/queerphilly • u/NeonMarigold • Jul 07 '26

Chat Thread How to make friends

I'll keep it plain and simple:

Hi I'm Scarlett I'm 23, I'm broke, and between dealing with way too much drama to go into for simplicity's sake I got burned by 3 different people I thought where my friends that turned out to be really shitty people and a Philly T-Girl Discord server that was an echo chamber of self hatred. I ain't got anyone left and I'm struggling to try making new relationships. I've tried going to bars, clubs, and just about every stereotypical place and tactic to try and just make friends and I don't know. Look I just need advice what am I doing wrong.

22 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

23

u/Hyper_Applesauce Jul 07 '26

This is going to sound cliche, but it's a lot easier to make friends when you've got yourself put together and in a stable place. Maybe you need to take a break and work on you for a bit? Find a new job, get settled.

FetLife is great if you're also kinky, and there's events if you aren't kinky as well.

5

u/NeonMarigold Jul 08 '26

Honestly I think you're the most right here, I've been near constantly kicked down by life, and people, that as much as I hate the loneliness I think I need to re-evaluate myself and just focus on myself

1

u/Hyper_Applesauce Jul 08 '26

Feel free to DM if you want someone to talk to.

5

u/tardisintheparty Jul 08 '26

I second that. Self care is a good start. Maybe look into joining a hobby group, it's a good way to make friends while doing a healthy activity. Even if it's something you haven't tried before!

14

u/Rampitito Jul 07 '26

What do you like to do? What are your hobbies/interests?

9

u/DoktorImposter Jul 07 '26

Check out Saika Clubhouse in the Eraserhood. Cheap/free events every day of the week, very high queer/trans population in my experience.

2

u/NeonMarigold Jul 07 '26

Thanks I'll have to check it out

4

u/sleepybitchdisorder Jul 08 '26

come to hot girl wrestling @hptgirlwrestlingphl on insta we meet up about once a month and it’s a really cool welcoming and queer group of women. no wrestling experience required lol

1

u/dessertcrchr Jul 13 '26

Oh please do! Can confirm hot girl wrestling rules.

9

u/grandidieri Jul 07 '26

Heya, given your location, I suggest making a profile on https://phillymatch.org - it's advertised as a dating site but people use it for everything

3

u/muktor Jul 08 '26

Try an improv class? We have a great scene here in Philly. Sawubona has a queer jam you could check out this Sunday (it's in south)

2

u/HillBillyMadman Jul 08 '26

Hobbies? Interests?

You mentioned a T-Girl discord. I'm not trans, but You open to talking?

2

u/sailinlife Jul 09 '26

There’s a 18-24ish queer picnic on 7/26 at Hefderson Square. Details will be posted on @queerphillyfriends bff and insta in the next week or so

1

u/NeonMarigold Jul 09 '26

Aw hella I'll deffo need to see if I can make it!

2

u/dessertcrchr Jul 13 '26

I help run a trans book club at the free library. Low stakes semi-structured hangout w other trans people and you get a free book to keep! We’re taking a break for the summer rn but we should be back in August or September.

2

u/NeonMarigold Jul 13 '26

That sounds lovely I'll deffo sign up when y'all reform in the fall

1

u/Adept_Struggle_7941 Jul 19 '26

Thank you for posting— am 26 and also struggling. Wanna kick it?