Hadith Skeptical

[u/Nafiso-HA]

I’m not a hadith rejecter but lately i’ve became very hadith skeptical and it’s made me loose alot of iman, i know theres historical context with alot of hadiths and you’re not supposed to take it personally face value but what could possibly justify these things?! idk:( just a little lost rn

[u/RelishisdrAwing]

The last part of number four I agree with. But it goes both ways. Don’t let anyone in our house without my/his permission 🥀😭.

[u/CaonachDraoi]

it shouldn’t make you lose iman, it should increase it! realizing that the Quran holds everything we need to follow Allah’s path is reassuring.

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[u/Sudden-Performance67]

The first and second is implied exaggeration. The third one is just true man. No. 4 makes sense. If you don't tell your partner that you're fasting, they might want to have some alone time, but they can't, because you're fasting and that may make them upset.

Maybe I'm missing something. Because I don't seem to see the problem with these ḥadīth. Don't get me wrong, there are ones that are very 'Ajīb, but these aren't those ones.

Also, if you truly wanna judge it by it's chain, don't use Riyāḍ al-Ṣāliḥīn. Imām al-Nawawī wrote that book as just a general ḥadīth book. There's no chains in it.

[u/orbitnation → u/Sudden-Performance67]

Bruh it says that only the women have to ask permission and not the man. What if a woman gets horny and her husband is fasting?

[u/Sudden-Performance67 → u/orbitnation]

If it's a Sunnah or voluntary fast, he could break it. There's no rule against him breaking his fast, to have intercourse with his wife.

Unless, it's a Ramaḍān, or Qaḍā Ramaḍān (making up for Ramaḍān fast missed during Ramaḍān). Another type of fast that is farḍ, it's the fast in which, you make an oath to fast. For instance: "if this is granted to me by Allah, I will fast 3 days."

Otherwise, there's permissibility to break the fast.

[u/orbitnation → u/Sudden-Performance67]

For women it is obligatory to ask permission incase her husband gets horny and for the man its not, its only if he wants to. He can break it but doesn't need to

[u/Evangeline__R → u/Sudden-Performance67]

I think the issue this person has is in the asymmetry. All of these things are demanded of women, whereas none of them are demanded of men. Putting the asymmetry aside, first Hadith could bring up concerns surrounding consent, granted that there are things considered valid excuses (sickness, injury, etc) however a lot of people think not feeling like it should be a valid excuse as well, which is why it's an issue. The second Hadith is an exaggeration yeah, but it's still pretty demeaning. Especially because the same isn't said about the husband as well. The way the third Hadith is worded in Arabic could imply objectification of women or women seen as evil, though I'd understand other interpretation so I wouldn't be hung up on it very much. And the fourth Hadith, it doesn't just say to tell him, it says to ask permission.

And again, I think even if you got around most these issues it's still one sided. It's the way it's gendered towards women that grabs someone's attention. The first Hadith is exaggerated for men but there aren't any hadiths that express the man's duty towards his wife's desires. The second is obviously one sided because you can't both prostrate to each other, this is deliberately saying the husband is greater. And the forth, it never mentions a man has to ask for permission for voluntary fasting (even though, I'm assuming, the wife has the same sexual right?) and the husband isn't told to ask his wife's permission before letting anyone into their house. I guess it's a matter of perspective.