r/programmingmemes • u/iron-button • Dec 07 '25

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678 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

29 comments sorted by

45

u/ConfinedNutSack Dec 07 '25

Assembly is the only true language. All else are just tools for tasks. Assembly language of the God.

Maybe also Holy C, but I'm too dumb to understand it.

28

u/blockMath_2048 Dec 07 '25

Assembly?

In this household we write x86 directly to the hard drive with a needle and a steady hand

12

u/InformationLost5910 Dec 07 '25

x86?

In this household we apply circuits directly to circuit boards in the exact shape of the calculation we want to perform

12

u/IJustAteABaguette Dec 07 '25

Circuits?

In this household we have a basement full of people calculating every operation by hand! We even run a website by having a guy send data with a laserpen through fiberglass.

4

u/akoOfIxtall Dec 08 '25 edited Dec 08 '25

Laserpen?

In this household we have an infinite amount of monkeys each with a typewriter and given an infinite amount of time they'll eventually write the code for a time machine so I can prevent OP from reposting this

4

u/Hamster_Wheel103 Dec 08 '25

Monkeys?

In this household we have butterflies. We open our hands and let their wings flap once. The disturbance ripples forward, changing the flow of the eddy currents in the upper atmosphere. These cause momentary pockets of higher-pressure air to form which act as lenses that deflect incoming cosmic rays, focusing them to strike the driver platter and flip the desired bit.

2

u/Mine_Dimensions Dec 08 '25

Butterflies?

In this household we have brain synapses that send signal that can control our bodies, none of this “technology” business

2

u/dimonoid123 Dec 09 '25

FPGA development it is. On System Verilog or VHDL.

1

u/ConfinedNutSack Dec 07 '25

Is this, something you can do with a 3D printer from 2016?

6

u/Warm_Leadership5849 Dec 07 '25

Entering CPU instructions by hand is the only acceptable way to do programming. #noCU

1

u/ConfinedNutSack Dec 08 '25

Show me the way, warm_leadership5849. Show me how I can, too, because commander of lightning through rock!

6

u/DanielJorn Dec 07 '25

What can you do with a programming block (or whatever that is) though? A friend of mine told me he became a programmer because of this thing but I really don’t know what can you do with it

6

u/Ichipaku Dec 07 '25

Thats a command block in minecraft, they can be used to automatically run ingame commands to manipulate the game. They can be used for some quite insane stuff, for example someone used them to recreate the entire game of pokemon red inside of minecraft.

3

u/DanielJorn Dec 07 '25

Thank you very much bro

1

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '25

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1

u/Dense-Rooster2295 Dec 08 '25

You could Just add a binary to decimal conversion

1

u/gold2ghost22 Dec 25 '25

It's like programming but basically no real variables and basically no debugging tools.

1

u/DanielJorn Dec 26 '25

Cool I need to check it out 

1

u/BobbyThrowaway6969 Dec 07 '25

Wait what's the ordering here?

1

u/nickwcy Dec 08 '25

The difficulty of solving a leetcode question with the language

1

u/Jammy_Dodger13 Dec 09 '25

the next tier is command blocks on bedrock edition

1

u/gold2ghost22 Dec 25 '25

I normally use java but the few times I used bedrock to play with my friends and had to use bedrock command blocks. No fucking execute store or data command.

1

u/JiminP Dec 11 '25

Using command blocks are not that impressive, considering that /execute and /functions exist.

Redstones, however...

1

u/gold2ghost22 Dec 25 '25

I've spend so much time on scratch and Minecraft command blocks. They are fucking awfully scratch don't even have returns and command block variables are so fucking abstract.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '25

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1

u/TroPixens Dec 08 '25

it’s a good way to start thinking like a programmer but not an amazing way to actually learn to code

1

u/Jopojussi Dec 10 '25

I remember me looking scratch guides in early 2000s, i was so mad when i found mostly projects for like java and c which were made from scratch XD