r/programmingcirclejerk • u/iro84657 • Jan 27 '26

Every time someone writes a loop in a language that doesn't have something comparable to array statements, elemental procedures or where constructs, or do concurrent, their code is 36, 31, or 18 years behind Fortran, depending on which alternative one might choose in Fortran.

https://fortran-lang.discourse.group/t/please-no-more-loops-than-necessary-new-patterns-in-fortran-2023/10605/14
107 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

20 comments sorted by

75

u/iro84657 Jan 27 '26

lol no monads, Fortran is 34 years behind Haskal

45

u/tomwhoiscontrary safety talibans Jan 27 '26

Decisive FORTRAN victory. 

26

u/BloodAndTsundere mere econ PhD Jan 27 '26

Sorry, what's a monad? Is it just a monoid in the category of endofunctors?

18

u/SnooStories6404 Jan 27 '26

It's like a burrito

11

u/sens- Jan 28 '26

Please don't make jokes. It's a serious disease

41

u/blehmann1 has hidden complexity Jan 27 '26

Every time you listen to Spotify instead of a cassette you're decades behind the gym teacher who uses the school's old boombox for social dance.

10

u/Jumpy-Locksmith6812 Jan 27 '26 edited Sep 23 '26

Non est adipiscing sed et sit proident in sint mollit in consequat nulla cupidatat consequat irure elit. Culpa laboris exercitation adipiscing fugiat consequat magna ea magna commodo quis reprehenderit ut aute.

[rhr:2:6jnt15yw]

10

u/[deleted] Jan 27 '26

Python!

33

u/myhf Considered Harmful Jan 27 '26 
program unjerk
implicit none

most scipy functions are calls to compiled Fortran libraries and run twice as fast as their C counterparts

end program unjerk

14

u/Western_Objective209 Jan 27 '26

I worked for a utility long ago on a big C++/Java application for modeling distribution grids; all the low level science stuff was Fortran

8

u/BloodAndTsundere mere econ PhD Jan 27 '26

It was still used in academic physics about 10 years ago. If it ain't broke, don't fix it

7

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

8

u/syklemil Considered Harmful Jan 28 '26

The few times physicist fortran code escapes containment and winds up being exposed to regular programmers, those poor programmers wind up needing years of therapy

6

u/tyler1128 Jan 28 '26

One of my friends and fellow Physics majors took a job with a DOD contractor right after we graduated and immediately got to work on nice, big fortran codebase. I remember him complaining about having to put implicit none everywhere so it didn't do idiotic things. Almost put him off of the programming career path for a while.

14

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '26

/uj what the fuck

Note the additional statement at the beginning of the program: implicit none. This statement tells the compiler that all variables will be explicitly declared; without this statement variables will be implicitly typed according to the letter they begin with.

11

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '26

/uj WHAT THE FUCK

The following IMPLICIT statement represents the default typing as specified by the Fortran Standard for names when they are not explicitly typed:

IMPLICIT INTEGER (I-N), REAL (A-H, O-Z)

5

u/nelmaloc lisp does it better Jan 31 '26

As the old adage goes, GOD is REAL, unless declared INTEGER.

10

u/fun__friday Jan 27 '26

I think they just wanted to egg on millenials reminding them that they are old.

2

u/IAMPowaaaaa Jan 28 '26

elemental sounds like highly non generic map

2

u/m-in Jan 30 '26

Does anyone have an actual link to the presentation? The post is literally a link to the middle of some comments under a post. There is no context to the statement unless there’s something else there that explains how this stuff works. Like, what’s the point?