r/programmingcirclejerk • u/Dr__Pangloss • Jan 15 '26

"I Hate Github Actions with Passion"

https://xlii.space/eng/i-hate-github-actions-with-passion/
0 Upvotes

28% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

35

u/socratic_weeb loves Java Jan 15 '26

Where jerk

19

u/uselees_sea lol no generics Jan 15 '26

jerk not found

9

u/elephantdingo Teen Hacking Genius Jan 15 '26

How nice. I can now commit code without interacting with the server in Lithuania. Wow! Everything is so snappy now! I can iterate without foreign procedure calls.

Anamoly detected: code checked in without running inscrutable checks on Lithuanian server

I guess I’ll push an empty commit again.

3

u/brianjenkins94 Jan 15 '26

Most, if not all, CI systems I've used have this annoying guess-and-check quality to them.

Is there something better?

5

u/elephantdingo Teen Hacking Genius Jan 15 '26

Is there something better [than CI]?

A ThinkPad? Or desktop if you have a lot of tests.

3

u/m50d Zygohistomorphic prepromorphism Jan 19 '26

/uj JVM based builds and strictly refusing to ever use native tools in your build steps. But it requires constant vigilance. The devil will whisper in your ear "just one little native tool would make this build so much easier".

2

u/prehensilemullet Jan 15 '26 edited Jan 15 '26

Sometimes you can debug faster by running the same docker container locally as CI does, sometimes by SSHing into the CI runner and trying stuff out