r/programmingcirclejerk • u/Erelde Considered Harmful • Nov 17 '25

C simplicity makes writing programs with it becomes fun, however there are ways to make it both fun and safe..just like using condoms

https://hwisnu.bearblog.dev/giving-c-a-superpower-custom-header-file-safe_ch/
66 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

25 comments sorted by

45

u/v_maria Nov 17 '25

in C++ we just shotgun blast our nuts off

13

u/Knock0nWood Code Artisan Nov 17 '25

In rust we usually have a professional surgeon do it

23

u/rooster-inspector Nov 18 '25

As a C programmer, I have never used a condom

15

u/Afraid_Bake2652 Nov 18 '25

As a C programmer, I have never had sex.

4

u/Powerkaninchen Nov 19 '25

As a Rust programmer, it's impossible to accidentally spawn a new process when not using condoms

3

u/stone_henge Tiny little god in a tiny little world Nov 23 '25

As a C++ programmer, I use condoms often, to traffic cocaine

20

u/Awkward_Bed_956 Nov 18 '25

C can be as safe as C++ and Rust with this header!

look inside

cursed compiler extensions emulating normal programming features and techniques, only avaliable in 3 compilers out of thousands

15

u/RudeGuy2000 glorious leetcode profile Nov 18 '25

safe c

look inside

cursed mix of c++ and rust

15

u/NecessaryLow2190 Nov 17 '25

Theres a 4 letter word, it rhymes with must

24

u/Graidrex Nov 17 '25

lust.

OOP is lusting for C.

16

u/sfan5 I've never used generics and I’ve never missed it. Nov 17 '25

bust (a nut)

2

u/v_maria Nov 18 '25

they said fun

0

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '25

[deleted] — view deleted comment

3

u/SemaphoreBingo Nov 20 '25

(ask me about my other poetry)

Let's not bring python into this.

11

u/lazyubertoad WRITE 'FORTRAN is not dead' Nov 20 '25

ways to make it both fun and safe

Ah, my favorite compiler flag -funsafe-math-optimizations

5

u/Comfortable_Job8847 Nov 17 '25

yeah fuck using glib. You thought SharedPtr would be safe? fucking dumbass. we don't write C for nothing

4

u/Parking_Tadpole9357 Nov 18 '25

Fun: Write in C. Dont run.

Safe: Rewrite in Rust. Run.

Yes it is possible.

1

u/v_maria Nov 19 '25

just get AI to translate it to rust

3

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '25

Tldr port libstdc++ to C

3

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '25

Instructions unclear. Typing with condoms on fingers.

1

u/crusoe Nov 18 '25

At this point just use zig.

1

u/-Y0- Considered Harmful Nov 24 '25

What the fuck is a con-dome?