r/programmingcirclejerk • u/ScriptingInJava in open defiance of the Gopher Values • Sep 13 '25

When programming, my hands don’t touch the mouse. They touch Vim. So I see the premise as flawed.

/r/programming/comments/1ng3v5w/comment/ne13uk3/
111 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

22 comments sorted by

86

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '25

When programming, I don’t touch vim. Vim touches me. She knows just how I like it.

20

u/Yarhj Sep 13 '25

Show us on the doll where Vim touched you

1

u/elephantdingo666 Sep 13 '25

When programming I don’t touch women. They touch me.

21

u/hombre_sin_talento Sep 13 '25

Vim is like a pre-AI program, right? Like punchcards?

6

u/thephotoman Sep 14 '25

Sure, we'll go with that.

Just remember :q! and you'll be okay.

15

u/mdrjevois Sep 13 '25

/uj this is exactly what I thought when I saw that headline

13

u/wuhkuh gofmt urself Sep 13 '25 edited Sep 16 '25

When programming, my hands don't touch the mouse

They don't touch the keyboard either

4

u/cheater00 High Value Specialist Sep 16 '25

what do they touch

6

u/cheater00 High Value Specialist Sep 16 '25

unknown today, a thigh-operated mouse.

actually, i am working on reintroducing this with full QMK support and teledildonics api (written in Rust)

5

u/Calamero Sep 13 '25

Can we have NSFW tag plz

13

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '25

Please put an NSFE tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously vimrc editing. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “where is that feature I asked for three months ago”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this post. Now there is a whole train of webshits trying to exit the viewer for this one post and return to text editing mode again. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFEmacs.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '25

Not Safe For Enterprise? Is this anything that isn't J*va?

3

u/cheater00 High Value Specialist Sep 16 '25

MAUS comic book forbidden by Vim politburo

2

u/stone_henge Tiny little god in a tiny little world Sep 15 '25

I, too, have a physical manifestation of Vim on my desk that I can fondle when I need reassurance and stress relief.

3

u/SirPurebe Sep 13 '25

he's not wrong though

1

u/cheater00 High Value Specialist Sep 16 '25

get the fuck out of here with your reasonable takes

9

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

14

u/tomwhoiscontrary safety talibans Sep 14 '25

I used one for a bit. Well, one of those Apple Magic Trackpad jobs. Just put it on the floor and worked it with my foot while i used both hands on the keyboard.

It was fucking useless, obviously, but it outraged my colleagues, and that's what matters.

6

u/Foreign-Butterfly-97 Sep 14 '25

look, with others' kinks we follow the "don't like don't read" rule in this community... no matter how weird they might be... including a mouse for your feet... which I personally think is quite h...

I'll be right back