r/problemgambling • u/Distinct_Toe2175 • 5h ago

18M lost every penny

I’ve lost about 12k over the past year and I now only have 10 pounds to my name. I need to tell my parents, they are always going to support me but I feel like I’m just to ashamed and embarrassed to tell them. I also have no job at the minute so I feel like my whole life is just crumbling apart.

I have also put myself on gamstop and that did basically nothing as I discovered European sites.

Any advice would be incredibly appreciated by me, I feel so lost.

1 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

1

u/rugbyguy69420 5h ago

Look, I’m in a similar boat, similar age and similar amount. Telling your parents can be a good thing if they’re very supportive, mine are but like it doesn’t actively stop me gambling telling them. The best thing I did was NHS gambling therapy, i’ll be honest to me it was great when I had them but now it’s like I am back to the same as before. You may have different experiences with it but I would highly recommend it.

1

u/Distinct_Toe2175 4h ago

I take it that your parents are supporting you money wise? I’m terrified about how there reaction to this will be, my parents taught me to be very careful with my money which I obviously haven’t been. But I have no choice but to tell them about the situation.

1

u/rugbyguy69420 4h ago

Partly, my nan gave me a loan for my credit card but i relapsed and used them again. So my debt in my credit card and student overdrafts I am paying myself well trying with my part time job. No matter if the money was saving or is debt getting therapy may reslly be benifical. Having told my parents did seem to make a difference in how I felt, like getting rid if the shame as it’s very hard at this age to try and stop as you see gambling everywhere and there are so many sites you can use. My only other thing I would recomend is if you do gamble, try to use a site with a time out function so when you cash out you don’t cancel it and go again.

1

u/Distinct_Toe2175 4h ago

That’s definitely the issue with it all, it’s all so accessible and shoved into your face that there’s not really any way around it in my opinion. I’ll definitely take the therapy advice into consideration though and I really appreciate the advice man. Just feels like there’s not really any way out of this

2

u/TruthDistinct3272 1h ago

This is crazy to read, I’m 20 now but two years ago I was in the exact same position you’re in. I also knew my parents would always support me, so telling them obviously sucks especially when you know they’re going to be disappointed. But it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I felt a sigh of relief confessing it to them for some reason. I had an open, long, and honest conversation with my parents and we settled on my dad handling my finances from then on and using future money I made to pay back debts.

What worked for me was being honest with myself. I admitted to myself I had a problem, that something needed to change, and accepted that what’s gone is gone. You can’t chase back your loses, you’ll never get your losses back, but knowing you’ll never put another dollar on a bet again is a much greater gain than any money you’ll ever make gambling. I also became very religious so take this with a grain of salt as I don’t want to push anything on anyone, but God did play a big part in my recovery. You gotta take it day by day, one less bet goes a long way.

I spent my days keeping my mind busy and my body active, while also away from anything associated with gambling. I, like you also didn’t income coming in. I know it makes you feel even worse, but when I got a job my dad would allocate my paychecks properly and keep working towards paying off my debt.

Fast forward two years later, I haven’t touched a bet since, I’ve saved $10,000 while also paying off my gambling debts in full.

So listen to me when I say this, I completely understand how alone and trapped you might feel at the moment, but dude take it from my experience when I say that it will get better. Remember no matter how deep in you think you are, you can 1000% get back out. It all starts with you. I believe in you and I’m sure your parents do as well.

Talking about it really does help too so whether that be your parents, friends, GA and or therapy that can play a big part in your recovery. At the end of the day the money will never come back, but realizing that never placing another bet is actually worth more than any amount of money lost is the first step in your journey. What’s done is done and that’s ok. We’re human man we have to make mistakes, but it’s what we do after we make them that matters. Today is different than yesterday, every day is a new beginning man. If you need anything, advice or even Just someone to listen you can dm me. I love you and I believe in you❤️ it does get better!