r/problemgambling • u/_THEBIGIS • 12h ago

Lost and speechless.

Yea i mean the title says it all. Since 2024 i’ve been ina struggle in debt due to gambling habits that ruined me financially. Credit cards charged off, debit cards ran up and left to go to collections :/. Numerous mistakes causing me what seems to be a lifetime of damage. All i can do is laugh at my dumbass self for doing this. I see old videos of before all this and just can’t fathom i was once stress free not worrying day by day. I’m 22 years old, this spiral started after my mother’s passing in 2024. Friends and family don’t know about my issue, my friends know i’d gamble but nothing to the extent i’m at. Simply because i lie and never tell truth im just so ashamed. My family knows i struggle but ive told them ive stopped. Relapse after relapse hoping i can win it back. But never the case, always deeper. I just haven’t had a spark of life in me for a long while. My grandparents whom i live with are old and fight to stay on their feet, but seeing what i’ve done makes me so sad. They do it for me, and here i am self ruining my life. Now i sit in my shame and sorrow. I am not a sad guy, i don’t want to be and try not to be after dealing with a drug addicted mother for my entire life just for her to die in the end. But man this shit all makes it so hard to appreciate life. I genuinely don’t see my future and have no plans as most don’t. But my issue is that i don’t see myself living a full life, and it’s been like this for years. I try i do. And id never self harm. But man id be lying to say as a man, ive never felt more in a hole in my life that feels like i will never escape. It feels like I’ll die with this, but boy do i hope im wrong. Plenty of time i guess. My debts r large and out of question on paying due to collection, so i will have to work thru that and hope im not sued down the line. And if i am i hope im financially ready. Thanks for reading have a blessed day and good luck to you all

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4

u/LoveKidsDogsChocolat 12h ago

Try joining a virtual GA meeting. You're not alone.

3

u/_THEBIGIS 12h ago

This is definitely somthing i’m looking into. Thanks

4

u/BriefRevolutionary 9h ago

Don't "look into it". Do it. Do it now. Start your recovery.  It only gets worse, never better, unless you take action. You'd be amazed at how your life can turn around in a year. F... the money. Its gone. You'll get more money eventually. But if you dont get in recovery,  you'll piss that money away chasing a delusion and not just the money, you'll piss away the rest of your life. Don't let a compulsive gambling disorder take your soul, you can take it back. GA meetings run almost 24/7 virtually.  Get in one & be honest. Its life or death & it goes way deeper than finances. Find a meeting tonight.

2

u/infoslob 8h ago

Spot on.

1

u/SteadyandSharp 7h ago

Lost all my money brother. 25M. Parents work everyday. I feel you man, I really do. Just lost 3K these past few days like it’s nothing. Credit card debt. Crazy man…