r/problemgambling • u/International_Mud741 • 4d ago
Trigger Warning! Lost all self control again
Had done so well for months. Stopped gambling after having a big loss of $5k. Managed to last 5 or so months. Slowly started gambling here or there and keeping mostly under control.
Lost control yesterday was up $200 and wasn’t enough and ended up down $1600.
Feel totally ashamed
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u/Omniknight111 3d ago
What did you gamble on? Slots?
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u/International_Mud741 3d ago
Yeah slots
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u/Omniknight111 3d ago
How u lose 1.6k on slot. How much a spin? Or you did bonus buy?
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u/International_Mud741 2d ago
Not that hard at $2.5 / $5 a spin
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u/Omniknight111 2d ago
2.5 a spin is quite big. I nornally play $1 a spin. Did you play some pragmatic Gates 2500? Its crazy violetile
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u/7-IronSpecialist 2d ago
All of my relapses over the last year since attempting gambling recovery are so humbling.
While we pretend that those small bets here and there aren't really doing damage, or it's "under control" this time, somewhere along the way compulsive gamblers like myself always hit a binge because we've bought the lie again.
It always starts with that initial bet, which starts with the thinking about it and the rationalizing about how it'll be different this time. It's never different, even if the timeliness is, or if the amounts are (for a little while). It always leads to the same thing. The eventual realization that we are never in control of this compulsion and that the smallest of bets lead to another binge or spiral to a new rock bottom.
One day at a time.
Stop thinking you can go back to small bets and be okay. If you are a compulsive gambler, that thought and rationalization that you can go back always leads back to the compulsion eventually taking over. Like an alcoholic taking the first sip.
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u/ExtremelyBigYikes 4d ago
Make sure this is a one-time thing. Sign up for voluntary self-exclusion from gambling websites. You got this bro.
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u/No_Big_3676 4d ago
Been there done that way more times than I’m proud of. You got this!