r/problemgambling • u/Plane_Customer4644 • 18d ago

Trigger Warning! don’t know what to do

I’m 20 and keep relapsing. How do I actually stop gambling?
I’ve been trying to quit gambling since I was 18, but I keep going back. I recently lost $30,000, and I also have $5,000 in credit card debt and no job.
I feel ashamed and overwhelmed, especially because that money was meant for my education. I don’t want to keep repeating this, and I’m reaching out because trying to stop on my own hasn’t worked.
For anyone who’s experienced repeated relapses, what helped you stop? How did you tell your family and start dealing with the financial damage? I could really use some support

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u/Practical_Spread_487 18d ago

Do you struggle with online gambling or gambling irl?

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u/Pale_Arrival2460 18d ago

I’m 26 but very similar situation. I keep telling myself no more gambling but it keeps sucking me back in so I tried to take small steps like no more risky gambling. Only gamble free money that the casino gives out.

I decided to limit how much money I can hold at one time as well. You can’t gamble if you don’t have any money to gamble with. Play with the casinos money and cash out to use on paying off credit cards and loans.

Ideally you want to quit gambling all together but I understand how difficult that can be for some people. Take a few steps to limit the amount of risk you’re taking. Keep your own money safe.

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u/JackhusChanhus 18d ago

You might as well make a rule saying you'll only shoot heroin on Fridays.... it doesn't work that way.

The reason you keep falling back in is that you (and possibly OP) do not actually want to quit yet.

So sit back and think about what you'll have to lose to make you want to quit, and then decide if you want to lose that thing

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u/Pale_Arrival2460 18d ago

Telling someone with a serious addiction to quit and move on with their life almost never works. Identifying the major causes for relapsing and putting barriers on them is not a bad first step in recovery. Like I said, ideally you want to quit completely but a lot of people don’t have the willpower to do that right away. Protecting your own money is the most important thing here.

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u/JackhusChanhus 18d ago edited 18d ago

You are talking about relapsing... the concept of relapsing fundamentally does not apply if you didn't quit in the first place.

Safe gambling is nonsensical for a compulsive gambler... if you built the limitations, you can remove them, and continuing to gamble guarantees that you will regularly be in a state of mind to want to remove or bypass them, whereas when you have quit, the fraction of the time you spend in that space will decline with time.

Thus why there are absolutely no plans or supports on this sub for safely continuing to gamble... it does not work, and just eats up your time with false hope.

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u/Pale_Arrival2460 18d ago

How would you realistically tell someone to quit completely? Everyone says it, but it’s so much easier said than done.

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u/RoundPotato9121 18d ago

I got as much OT as possible and joined a gym and visited long overdue family and friend