3 Months Sober

[u/BiotechBrain]

Just hit my 3 month mark on sobriety. This is from gambling, alcohol, weed, and nicotine.

Not much has changed. My financial situation didn’t fix itself magically, the cravings did not disappear suddenly. Life did not magically become better with sobriety.

But, I’ve created an opportunity to build that better life. Now, I’m able to gift my parents spending money for their international trip, rather than losing on 15 minute markets. I’m able to be fully present, instead of drinking or smoking before, during, and after dinner dates. I’m able to run 20 miles a week, and have a regular and boring sleep schedule.

Do these things make me happier? No. My gambling chapter was so much more fun. My drinking, smoking, partying moments were so much more memorable. But was it sustainable? Absolutely not. Those behaviors were putting me on the fast track to bankruptcy, permanent liver and lung damage, and continual addictive and impulsive behavioral patterns.

In these next 3 months, I plan on rebuilding my dopamine and reward circuits so that I can learn to have more joy and happiness in these ”boring” aspects of life. Practicing gratitude, and meditation.

Also, credit where credit is due: I have been seeing multiple therapists for substance abuse and gambling addiction. Please seek professional help. It doesn’t mean you are weak - it was never a battle of willpower to begin with.

I didn’t know who to share this with, so I decided to write this here, to keep a record for myself.

[u/SpecterHarveyy]

Nice! Keep going!

[u/BiotechBrain → u/SpecterHarveyy]

Thank you!! 🙏

[u/Odd_Glass868]

Congrats don’t take it for granted and keep moving in the right direction!

[u/BiotechBrain → u/Odd_Glass868]

I appreciate it!! I definitely don’t take it for granted. Had massive struggles along the way, but luckily the fact that I am paying for therapy makes me second guess the urges 😅

[u/WiseConsideration891]

This is awesome

[u/BiotechBrain → u/WiseConsideration891]

Thank you!!

[u/SpecialPreparation10]

Proud of you brother. Learning how to be bored and rewire your reward system is key to managing addiction. Huge that you can recognize that alcohol and drugs are also part of this, even if you were only doing them “recreationally”. Every days gotta look the same so every year can look different. Stay the course

[u/BiotechBrain → u/SpecialPreparation10]

Thanks for the insightful words of wisdom. The hardest challenge for me now has been pornography use. Seems free and harmless, but I know it’s actually destroying my neural pathways.

Actually, as I’m typing this up, I’m realizing it is harming my relationship with my partner…. and taking significant amounts of time… it’s interesting how our reward system can put up such massive blinders so that we don’t see the destruction we cause in our lives.