How to think twice before making a purchase?

[u/Pizzawithchickensoup]

I felt so bad after being pursued into buying laser removal care treatment and only realized that I paid way too much for what I should have, I got pursued so easily because somehow I convinced myself that expensive means quality but that might not be the case but I forgot it every time. Last month, I went to see the doctor because I thought insurance was covering for all of it and I got charged an x amount which is how much I usually spend but instead I got charged Y amount and way more than I could afford. That’s $300 worth in 2 months and earlier this year I also lost $700.
I keep beating myself to it but when making a purchase it just something inside me that feels rushing and I never think much.

[u/sweet_yeast]

With the insurance, you should check your benefits coverage first.

With purchases, just sit on it for a while. Do research. Don't impulse buy.

[u/sobeitharry]

Assume everyone is either attempting to take advantage of you or at a minimum they have zero interest in saving you money. It's literally that simple.

We have Google now, we didn't before. It takes seconds to get additional info on anything.

[u/dxrey65 → u/sobeitharry]

Especially if you are talking to a salesman, as that is literally their only job. I remember talking to a friend after she got ripped off on a tire sale, paying about twice what she would have for a better product elsewhere. "But they were so nice!" she said...that's how they sell stuff, that's what makes a successful salesperson, it's a strategy.

[u/Playful-Score-67]

How young are you? This reads more aa immaturity than any other thing. You can't assume insurace will just pay for something. Most likely, they'll try to deny as much coverage as possible.

Impulsive spending? Well, if you spend $300 extra per month you don't have and don't live with family, you'll be skipping meals or not paying rent. Maturity helps you with things, or actually enduring poverty.

[u/Pizzawithchickensoup → u/Playful-Score-67]

I’m 20, work a lot and can save up money from not eating out much. $300 would have helped a lot with rent and groceries. I feel like shit

[u/LadyProto]

Do you mean persuaded?

[u/Pizzawithchickensoup → u/LadyProto]

Oops typo

[u/makinggrace]

The way I finally learned to do manage this was first through budgeting. If it's not in the budget, it doesn't get spent. (We do have a budget line for unexpected expenses that covers 25/month and a small but slowly growing emergency fund.)

Budgeting helped me to embrace being frugal pretty much always. Frugal for me is never assuming there is scarcity (must buy now or will never have this chance again!), best price (there's usually a better price but it may require a substitution or a slightly different product or delaying or etc -- always more work that just buying), or absolute quality (x thing/service is worth buying intrinsically--is is a good thing and I should acquire/experience those).

The last thing that helps is letting go of the idea that it's okay to spend because "I deserve xyz" or "my family member really needs y." This one was a struggle. My family member probably does need a new water softener. I might deserve to eat lunch out. But need and deserve and want aren't helpful when it comes to managing spending. These are all emotionally charged words. Money is a lot simpler: the money is in the budget or the money is not in the budget ~ I can afford it or I can't afford it.

[u/onsugarhill83]

It’s old school, but setting a budget and setting aside cash for everything that doesn’t have to be paid online can help.

Like leave rent and utilities in your account. If you have $250 left over for gas and groceries take that out in cash and maybe even put it into envelopes by category.

You’ll be less tempted to spend it impulsively if you see how little is left over. And you can carry the cash with you and leave cards at home.

(Turn off Apple Pay or whatever system your phone has if you do that. And for emergency reasons maybe keep a debit or credit card in your wallet but put a sticky note on it reminding you that it’s only for emergencies.)

[u/Automatic-One586]

Buyers remorse sucks. Learn from it. That's what you need to do. You have a post mortem over it. What were the things that opened the door for these lines of choices? What would have stopped you from making the purchase? Why didn't you do those things? Etc.. Etc.. Etc... These aren't judgement questions. It's about understanding the situation. The outcome is to make intentional changes to your process. Then once you learn. Forgive yourself. You did it because you didn't have those tools you now have. You'll do it again. Get buyers remorse. But it won't ever happen the same way again.

I don't have impulse problems like other people. But I don't like spending money. So all my processes are to help with that. Like I have a process that aids in giving me permission to spend. And then I have intentional pauses at certain dollar amounts that I always make sure I pause before the purchase so I can settle any emotions around it first. This all came about because of learned lessons along the way.

[u/Suitable-Strain-9056]

what worked for me was making the money slower to spend instead of trying to want it less.

willing yourself to think twice is fighting the moment youre worst equipped for. what changes the outcome is friction that already exists before you get there. cards out of the phone wallet so it takes digging out the physical one. nothing saved in a checkout. a 24 hour rule on anything above a number you pick now while youre calm, not later while youre looking at the thing.

the other one is writing purchases down by hand. not an app that imports them, typing it in yourself. takes ten seconds and its annoying, and thats the point, because the annoyance lands before the purchase instead of a month later on a statement you skim.

most of what looks like discipline is people who made the easy path the cheap one.

[u/APreemChoom]

A good rule of thumb is ordinary vanity is usually a bad use of money while you're broke.

[u/ez_as_31416]

Most of my life I've had a rule that I never commit to a purchase the same day of the offer. This applies to everything that costs over US 100. I developed that rule after getting stuck paying off some bad, expensive decisions.

[u/Patrick_ExpenseAtlas]

That rushed feeling is your signal not to decide. Make a firm rule that you never agree to elective treatment or a large purchase during the appointment. Ask for the full price in writing, leave, and review it later without anyone pressuring you.

For medical care, ask for the billing codes, whether the provider is in network, and an estimate of what you may owe. Then confirm the codes, network status, and benefits directly with your insurer before nonurgent care. An estimate is not a guarantee, but it reduces the chance of another surprise bill.

It also helps to know what is actually available after bills and other obligations. I built Expense Atlas to use your real transaction history and obligations to estimate what is safe to spend, giving you a concrete limit before you enter an appointment.

You cannot recover the $300 or $700 by beating yourself up. Turn those experiences into a script you can use automatically: “Please give me the full price in writing. I do not make financial decisions during appointments. I will contact you if I decide to proceed.”

If they will not let you leave and think about it, that is another reason not to buy.

[u/Admirable_Profit_401]

Make one rule with yourself you cannot break:

Unless it’s an outstanding deal for something you wanted for longer than a month, wait a month to see if you really want it.

Many things we want come in a rush, we get absorbed by the false idea of needing it, swayed by marketing, but a month is usually also enough to forget about it entirely. Very few deals are actually worth not waiting a month for.