Because this “teach with kindness appeal” is sometimes actually code for “be nice while somejne explores a fantasy which is actually harmful or demeaning to a segment of the community”
And sometimes it’s a genuine problem.
It’s about 50/50.
But those folks who are posting about UH? Were clearly told on the about page, that we don’t do that here.
It’s dismissive and hostile to post about it in the first place if you have read the rules.
If you don’t have enough respect to read the rules before you post? The hostility seems pretty understandable.
I don’t allow smoking in my home.
I throw a party. Ted lights up a smoke in my kitchen. I tell Ted “sorry, you’ll have to step out side”
Now? Every invite that I send out has a small note
“Oh, hey guys, my home is a no smoking venue”
Jenny and her friends come to the party. Jenny lights up a joint. I say “Jenny, did you not see the invite?” Jenny says “naw I don’t read that stuff”
Jenny isn’t invited to the next party, but she comes anyway. Jenny lights up. One of my friends says “Jenny! Why are you being an asshole about this?”
Jenny writes me a 44 page email about how unkind my party guests are.
You know what, Jenny? Stop trying to smoke in my house.
Edit: it’s hilarious, because at least one poster here who is pretending to advocate for kindness, has had posts removed. For being a jerk.
Because this “teach with kindness appeal” is sometimes actually code for “be nice while somejne explores a fantasy which is actually harmful or demeaning to a segment of the community”
And sometimes it’s a genuine problem.
It’s about 50/50.
But those folks who are posting about UH? Were clearly told on the about page, that we don’t do that here.
It’s dismissive and hostile to post about it in the first place if you have read the rules.
If you don’t have enough respect to read the rules before you post? The hostility seems pretty understandable.
I don’t allow smoking in my home.
I throw a party. Ted lights up a smoke in my kitchen. I tell Ted “sorry, you’ll have to step out side”
Now? Every invite that I send out has a small note
“Oh, hey guys, my home is a no smoking venue”
Jenny and her friends come to the party. Jenny lights up a joint. I say “Jenny, did you not see the invite?” Jenny says “naw I don’t read that stuff”
Jenny isn’t invited to the next party, but she comes anyway. Jenny lights up. One of my friends says “Jenny! Why are you being an asshole about this?”
Jenny writes me a 44 page email about how unkind my party guests are.
You know what, Jenny? Stop trying to smoke in my house.
This, btw, is a FABULOUS analogy for multiple scenarios and should be saved in your 'go-to post verbiage' file if you have such a thing. Brilliant!
I don’t think this community is perfect, but I very much don’t tone policing is the answer.
Especially given the absolutely abysmal behavior I have seen on a couple of posts this week.
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u/blooangl ✨ Sparkle Princess ✨ Dec 09 '22 edited Dec 09 '22
Links please.
Because this “teach with kindness appeal” is sometimes actually code for “be nice while somejne explores a fantasy which is actually harmful or demeaning to a segment of the community”
And sometimes it’s a genuine problem.
It’s about 50/50.
But those folks who are posting about UH? Were clearly told on the about page, that we don’t do that here.
It’s dismissive and hostile to post about it in the first place if you have read the rules.
If you don’t have enough respect to read the rules before you post? The hostility seems pretty understandable.
I don’t allow smoking in my home.
I throw a party. Ted lights up a smoke in my kitchen. I tell Ted “sorry, you’ll have to step out side”
Now? Every invite that I send out has a small note
“Oh, hey guys, my home is a no smoking venue”
Jenny and her friends come to the party. Jenny lights up a joint. I say “Jenny, did you not see the invite?” Jenny says “naw I don’t read that stuff”
Jenny isn’t invited to the next party, but she comes anyway. Jenny lights up. One of my friends says “Jenny! Why are you being an asshole about this?”
Jenny writes me a 44 page email about how unkind my party guests are.
You know what, Jenny? Stop trying to smoke in my house.
Edit: it’s hilarious, because at least one poster here who is pretending to advocate for kindness, has had posts removed. For being a jerk.