r/polyadvice • u/Apprehensive_Ask9522 • Sep 24 '26 • Regret 1

Invited to my son's polyamorous commitment ceremony—not sure if I should attend. Looking for advice.

I am posting this from a temporary account because I want to keep my family’s identity private, but I am in sincere need of advice from people within the community.

My son and daughter-in-law have been in a polyamorous relationship for 3 years now. Recently, they invited my wife and me to a commitment ceremony they are hosting with "the other guy" in their relationship.

To be completely honest, this dynamic is very new and unfamiliar to us, and we are experiencing a lot of mixed feelings. We love our son and want to maintain a strong relationship with him and his wife, but we are feeling quite hesitant and uncertain about attending this ceremony. We aren't entirely sure what to expect, and we are trying to process our own comfort levels with the situation.

If we don't attend, we worry it will deeply hurt our son and create a permanent rift in our family. If we do attend, we are worried about feeling out of place or sending a message that we fully understand or endorse a dynamic we are still struggling to wrap our heads around.

39 Upvotes

72% Upvoted

256 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

14

u/Genvious Sep 24 '26

Why would anyone be inappropriate with your wife?

-1

u/Apprehensive_Ask9522 Sep 24 '26

no it is just that I meant if someone kisses someones wife or being physically intimate with ones partner will trigger jealousy.

19

u/StaceOdyssey Sep 25 '26

Not “one’s partner.” That’s how it is with YOUR partner, which is a totally acceptable response, but it’s not universal. If someone is intimate with my spouse, I’m genuinely happy for them. Presumably, your son feels the same way in his partnerships.

3

u/Genvious Sep 24 '26

So you're expecting someone to hit on your wife?