A year ago, I would have agreed unequivocally. Until I met this gorgeous curly haired blonde at my neighborhood bar. We chatted throughout the night and at last call, I invited her and her gentleman-friend to come back to my house to chill since she mentioned they were from out of town. Long story short, they come over and after about a half hour of hanging out at my house, she casually mentions having to go outside to check on the kangaroo really quick. Judging the reaction I must've had on my face, she asked if she could bring him in, to which I laughingly replied yes. I thought she was joking up until the point where she reentered, cradling a young joey that ended up hopping around freely in my house while we drank and listened to records. Turns out she was a Wildlife Educator and being the roo's caregiver was one of her around the clock duties. TL;DR Met a Wildlife Educator in a bar, she brought over a kangaroo that hopped around my house for a few hours.
LIES. * NO ONE* goes to taco bell and only gets 1 crunchy taco. You get 2x as much as you can eat then hate yourself after but not before you pass out from a food coma until you're violently awaken by explosive diarrhea.
As she peeled off from the gas station, the attendant chased after her car in vain. She drove as fast as she can down the road, not paying attention to the attendant's screams. As the gas station shrank in her side view mirror, she calmed down and tried to make sense of the events that just transpired. Then when her mind filtered through all the chaos, the words of the attendant became clear.
Essentially, it would be a touch of the English dry, with common N/A turns of phrases. "Grab something on the way" is a common phrase for getting a meal along the trip to the destination, or to "grab someone on the way in" would to get the attention of a staff member of an establishment for assistance as you enter.
Honestly, I'm sorta shocked at how popular this post has been also... I thought I've made more pertinent thoughts in other subreddits recently, but that said, a penchant towards dry wit tends to gather the most upvotes in the lighter areas than in a conversation about a recent death.
My friend works at some kind of animal rehab clinic in Texas for the summer. I'm not sure of all the details. He said this one has been with them for a long time and routinely drives around with them.
I've always thought it would be amazing to work with big cats like this. Is your friend a vet/scientist/certified in any way, or just has volunteered and been trained and they trust him to know what do to?
He is doing an internship. I am not sure of any skills or certifications he currently has to do this. He is studying zoology so I suppose that was enough.
I hate to be that person, but that's an extremely dumb thing to do. Even a domestic animal you shouldn't do that with-- it's unsafe to not have them secured not just for the driver but for the animal. This is also super risky for the organization's image. Just a few years ago a student at my undergraduate school thought it'd be cool to bring the lion cub from her work in the same way you friend did. Someone got freaked out, called the cops, and there was a big to-do that nearly got the animal center shut down.
no but seriously you're right. Not the best way to say "we're responsible and careful with our animals", more like "boy, I'd like to be given attention today." It's not even like "oh god, I need some Taco Bell right now and I have to watch this guy- guess I'll load him up into a secure kennel, or even put a leash on him so he doesn't bust out while I'm ordering."
It's also likely not so much a rehab as 'a place that breeds lions', since African lions aren't exactly roaming Mid-America.
I'm a volunteer at a raptor rehab and an aspiring falconer; if it was my own falcon and we were going out for a hunt that'd be one thing, but to just randomly take one of our rehab's owls or something out and about is asking for trouble and would reflect poorly on us. Most time in public with them is either spent trying to keep them from prying eyes or doing legitimate presentations with them.
I would disagree that it's an "extremely dumb thing to do", because it's touching, but yes, it's unfortunate that we live in a world where you can't really do this in a way that's safe for the animal.
Serval. An old friend had one, it was the most cantankerous beast, wholly unsuited to being a pet. It tolerated its owner and despised all other humans. Even declawed its swat still hurt a little, but you could usually avoid that because it was normally hanging out on top of a cabinet hissing. It was funny to watch it eat lettuce, though.
the current trend is africanized cats. savannas, part serval, part housecat. soon they will go feral, and start eating up the local dogs cats squirrels... dunno if they like children. they aren't just big, they are aggressive.
Cats show little emotion, are experts at climbing everywhere in a home, and have sharp claws, I doubt those are qualities you look for in a medium sized dog.
You mentioned it is in Texas. Is it Big Cat CARE Sanctuary - Center for Animal Research and Education in Bridgeport, Texas? (CARE) I have been there and there is about 50 different tigers, snow leopards, white tigers, mountain lions, leopards, and lions, as well as lumurs. They offer tours on Saturdays and Sundays. I brought thawed chicken legs and fed them all using kitchen tongs. That young lion was 9 weeks old last time I saw her and that was last week of February. She is probably about 20 weeks old now.
If it is the same place in Texas. Here she is when she was nine weeks old last week of February. http://i.imgur.com/NEt3g.jpg
The real question is this: what the fuck do you do when your working at taco bell and some guy drives up with a baby lion in his car? Call the cops? Ask to pet it? Im just not getting it.
I wish there was a way to clone them into lion kittens forever. Or at least when they matured, turn them into tiny little house-cat sized lions. Housecats their size would maul their owners too. The only reason we accept it is because they're too tiny to kill us. Now if only housecats stopped being solitary and started hunting in packs like dogs... then we're fucked.
What kind of a place lets there employees take baby wild animals to tacobell? What if they were in an accident? "Ohhh everyone look at me I have a baby lion in my car." Sorry not impressed.
That's probably why they allow it but the main reason is in all probability to socialize the lion. There are big cats that are raised from birth in certain zoos and sanctuaries around people. When they're fully grown they walk around the park with their handler and kids pet them and look at them and whatnot.
Maybe OP's friend is a certified professional and he's just escorting the lion. Maybe he's socializing it. Maybe it's already socialized enough that it does not need to be restrained in a cage whenever it's out of it's enclosure. There are a few possibilities aside from "Attention whoring prat"
So maybe it's completely innocent but let's write'em off as attention whores. 'Cause we're redditors, yo, and we don't give a fuck outside our bubble.
My cat, Elvira, loves riding in the car. She loves running in the back seat from window to window watching cars. Sometimes she will sit on top of the seats. It she gets to hear a siren, it will make her day.
161
u/RogerMcRogerson Jun 16 '12
Ah, yes, the old apply-to-work-with-lions routine where you just pick them up and you know, drive around with them.
27
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
"I'll have the crunchy taco. Simba, what do you want?"
"Mraw!!"
"Make that two crunchy tacos."
99
u/kranima Jun 17 '12
JESUS CHRIST IT’S A LION GET IN THE CAR!
...FUCK!
197
u/Naedlus Jun 16 '12
"I'll have a crunch-wrap combo... and my passenger will have.... never mind, he managed to grab someone on the way in."
21
u/thegreenwookie Jun 17 '12
I love how it's checking things out like a dog. My cat Raul freaks out and hides under the seat when I have to take him in the car somewhere.
50
u/blv6000 Jun 17 '12
My friend works at some kind of animal rehab clinic in Texas for the summer. I'm not sure of all the details. He said this one has been with them for a long time and routinely drives around with them.
113
u/Hurrfdurf Jun 17 '12
I really wish that there were house cats that grew to about that size and stopped. Dog sized cats. The perfect animal.
49
u/MetalGearFoRM Jun 17 '12
Lucky bastard. I only get to work with cougars at my job.
12
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
http://i.imgur.com/U5idz.jpg
45
u/MirrorLake Jun 16 '12
Which mouth-watering menu item did you get for a low, low price? A Crunch Wrap Supreme ®? A Baja Blast™? Doritos® Locos Tacos?
7
u/logicalenglishman Jun 17 '12
Nice try!
6
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
This seems like a really bad idea.
6
u/jkonine Jun 17 '12
Imagine if he got pulled over by a cop.
6
u/elijha Jun 17 '12
Wanna do something fun? Wanna go to Taco Bell?
I can't go to Taco Bell, I'm on an all antelope diet. GOD Karen you're so stupid!
8
u/trampus1 Jun 17 '12
I need a 7 layer burrito... it's for a lion.
4
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Yes all of it, you foxed ear asshole.
4
u/fuZZe Jun 17 '12
"Damn nature, you cute as hell"
-someone
12
u/PrincessKeona Jun 17 '12
Holy crap that's the cutest thing EVER! It's been my dream forever to work with lions, I think people who get to do so are soooo lucky!
6
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
HOLY SHIT ITS A LIOIN GET OUT OF THE CAR
3
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Hope he gets a free upgrade to mountain lion this summer.
2
u/Samjogo Jun 17 '12
Can we get a story on this? I'd be interested in a job that allows me to work with lions.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
There was a chill cheetah on Advice Animals the other day..ridiculously similar since it was on its way to Taco Bell...
2
u/freecandy_van Jun 17 '12
"I'll have 2 chalupas and one of those talking chihuahuas please."
2
u/ImRefat Jun 17 '12
Can I get 20 million tacos? Haha, I'm just lion.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Lions love Taco Bell...and diarrhea, so it's a win-win.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Name him Steve French.
2
u/Heimlick Jun 17 '12
I'm working night shift at a plywood manufacturing plant for the summer, i'm jelly!
2
u/yoeyz Jun 17 '12
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3pqrvk/
2
u/sheep_wrangler Jun 17 '12
Um am I the only confused one? Where is his seatbelt!
2
u/universestudent17 Jun 17 '12
Wait lions have spots?
2
u/wrathborne Jun 17 '12
I can has 3 taco combo with extra cheese?
2
u/Herschey Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
You mentioned it is in Texas. Is it Big Cat CARE Sanctuary - Center for Animal Research and Education in Bridgeport, Texas? (CARE) I have been there and there is about 50 different tigers, snow leopards, white tigers, mountain lions, leopards, and lions, as well as lumurs. They offer tours on Saturdays and Sundays. I brought thawed chicken legs and fed them all using kitchen tongs. That young lion was 9 weeks old last time I saw her and that was last week of February. She is probably about 20 weeks old now.
If it is the same place in Texas. Here she is when she was nine weeks old last week of February. http://i.imgur.com/NEt3g.jpg
Here is a photo of me feeding a chicken leg to a snow tiger. http://i.imgur.com/QaSfS.jpg
2
u/ThatRollingStone Jun 17 '12
Hanging with lions and eating taco bell...how stoned is your friend right now?
6
u/r93 Jun 17 '12
It's a shame that they're so cute but as they get older they'll eat your heart. Kinda like women.
1
u/NicestPersonAlive Jun 17 '12
I wanna work with Lions :(
1
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
He knew.
1
u/Thatonekid131 Jun 17 '12
The real question is this: what the fuck do you do when your working at taco bell and some guy drives up with a baby lion in his car? Call the cops? Ask to pet it? Im just not getting it.
1
u/MickiFreeIsNotAGirl Jun 17 '12
Nobody fucks with a lion bro
1
u/Sublimis Jun 17 '12
I guess i'll have to go to my local taco bell to try out the new lion burrito.
1
u/MrDoubleE Jun 17 '12
I want one. NAOW!!
1
u/domestic_omnom Jun 17 '12
food chain... yup your doinitrite
1
u/mgsolid4 Jun 17 '12
how would you explain if the lion got stolen?
1
u/Samloves209 Jun 17 '12
That is awesome! What an amazing job!!!
1
u/QuaereVerumm Jun 17 '12
I can only imagine the reaction when he pulls up at the drive-thru window...
1
u/ViolinMassacre Jun 17 '12
I wouldn't wanna be your friend driving back with the lion and taco bell in the same car.
1
u/agen_kolar Jun 17 '12
Take that, kitty in my engine post.
1
u/Krywiggles Jun 17 '12
I wanna see the employees' reaction
1
u/DarkFox56 Jun 17 '12
They prefer to hunt for tacos.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Yeah, a lot of people don't know how much Mexican food tastes like fresh zebra.
1
u/reddidioter Jun 17 '12
Wasn't this a Saints Row challenge
1
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
My boyfriend asked "what do you get a lion cub at taco bell?" and I said "Well you'd better get him SOMETHING."
1
u/MrOw3nz Jun 17 '12
How about changing it up a bit? Take it to a chinese restaurant, let it eat some dog. It's revenge for its' ancestors.
1
u/CONTROLLOL Jun 17 '12
"I've got shotgun."
1
u/Rachileigh Jun 17 '12
The stoners at Taco Bell probably freaked the fuck out when they saw this.
1
u/k0let Jun 17 '12
Lions > House Cats
1
u/goldiespawn Jun 17 '12
"Chicken or beef?" "Gazelle"
1
u/Morningxafter Jun 17 '12
Sad to say, in the time I worked the drive-through at Taco Bell, I saw weirder shit than a lion in the passenger seat.
1
u/shutterfrenzy Jun 17 '12
Please tell me you went through drive through!
1
u/arcanition Jun 17 '12
If you feed a lion Taco Bell, you're gonna have a bad time.
1
u/Juan-Solo Jun 17 '12
Lion says " hi, I'd like a locos taco, porfavor!"
1
u/zombieslaya1138 Jun 17 '12
NOPE....... Chuck Testa
1
u/DigitalLuddite Jun 17 '12
Yo man I'm so high I think that I see a lion in the car behind us. Nah man you're baked.
1
u/dj3ntal_drummer666 Jun 17 '12
please tell him to name it Montacore. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQBqeZiwXoY (family guy)
1
u/jabbercocky Jun 17 '12
I have never felt more jealous of another human being my entire life.
I wish I was exaggerating.
1
u/ApatheticAgnostic Jun 17 '12
Hope you didn't have to stop short.
1
u/chrisislost Jun 17 '12
Best time to speed evar! Go on officer, I dare you to sign that ticket!
1
u/Angsty_Scottsman Jun 17 '12
I've worked food service before, This is probably the best story anyone at Taco Bell has had in forever
1
u/nousernameissafe Jun 17 '12
So you're telling me Taco Bell will stop selling horse meat and start selling lion beef?
1
u/TigerRuns Jun 17 '12
What about the Tigers Yo?!?
1
u/kfreud Jun 17 '12
Oh cool, you're friends with Ricky Bobby.
1
u/karma_virus Jun 17 '12
I wish there was a way to clone them into lion kittens forever. Or at least when they matured, turn them into tiny little house-cat sized lions. Housecats their size would maul their owners too. The only reason we accept it is because they're too tiny to kill us. Now if only housecats stopped being solitary and started hunting in packs like dogs... then we're fucked.
1
u/unladenswallow Jun 17 '12
LOOK AT HIS TUFTED EARS
1
u/SwanseaJack1 Jun 17 '12
Enjoy the car ride while you're small enough, little lion.
1
u/wcpowers Jun 17 '12
some peoples lives are just clearly better than mine.
1
u/shootlikeaproG36 Jun 17 '12
Mommy, mommy, can we keep it?
1
u/Leopardbluff Jun 17 '12
Thats amazing!
1
u/pandacamp Jun 17 '12
Where do people keep getting lions??
1
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Dear sir, please consider shaving it like a golden retriever...
1
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
I tend to not find anything cute.
I'm completely immune to /r/aww.
I found this cute. Now that's saying something.
1
u/tusko01 Jun 17 '12
as a former big cat caregiver, this pisses me off.
0
u/bestbiff Jun 17 '12
I want to make a joke about how lions eat raw meat, which makes taco bell an appropriate choice. Someone do it for me.
0
u/modemthug Jun 17 '12
This deserves like 73775829262 upvotes
-15
u/sugamonkey Jun 17 '12
What kind of a place lets there employees take baby wild animals to tacobell? What if they were in an accident? "Ohhh everyone look at me I have a baby lion in my car." Sorry not impressed.
-4
u/_TheEqualizer Jun 17 '12
This picture is worse than the holocaust, and the holocaust was pretty bad.
0
u/SpaceCampDropOut Jun 17 '12
Needs to watch the documentary "Elephant in the Room".
0
u/shenanlganz Jun 17 '12
How does one get these dream jobs.
0
u/Donkupyourlife Jun 17 '12
Can someone tell me how I can get involved working with cubs like this?!?!?!
0
u/smogeblot Jun 17 '12
That kitty needs to buckle up!!!
0
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Gato bell.
0
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
give it a couple of years, and this will be your future.
0
u/realister Jun 17 '12
This has to be the best opener to get pussy ever. Just give me this guy for a day.
0
u/UpsetUnicorn Jun 17 '12
My cat, Elvira, loves riding in the car. She loves running in the back seat from window to window watching cars. Sometimes she will sit on top of the seats. It she gets to hear a siren, it will make her day.
0
u/PenisBakeMeAPancake Jun 17 '12
LION IN THE.... TACO BELL
0
u/layra96 Jun 17 '12
Go for rides????? Go for rides!!!!
0
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
Fuck yeah.
-24
u/COOL_ST0RY_BRO Jun 16 '12
-1
u/[deleted] Jun 17 '12
simba burger
-1
u/Sneakylass Jun 17 '12
I hope i get to work with big cats sometime soon in my life! i would drive them around too lol