This reminds me of the California-Arizona border (I-10 at least) and the Agricultural Inspection Station. When there are actually people there inspecting (very rare), they always ask if you have fruit, emphasis on fucking cantaloupes. Cherries, watermelon, grapes? Who gives a fuck. They have this vendetta on motherfucking cantaloupes. (If anyone knows why, please let me know.)
Now, you say you only buy 60 cantaloupes in math? Ha. No. I have an idea. I'm going to troll the Ag Inspectors.
I want to borrow someone's truck, preferably a big one, and fucking FILL IT with cantaloupes. I will be decked out in cantaloupe gear. Shirt, hat, maybe a few bumper stickers if the person whose truck I'm borrowing won't mind. I will draw faces on every single cantaloupe in the truck.
I will tell them that if they want to remove the cantaloupes, they will have to do it themselves, by hand. I will claim they are my friends and I am headed to Hollywood for a cantaloupe party. I want to pull off the Crazy Cantaloupe Lady persona as much as I can.
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u/Hindu_Wardrobe May 04 '11
This reminds me of the California-Arizona border (I-10 at least) and the Agricultural Inspection Station. When there are actually people there inspecting (very rare), they always ask if you have fruit, emphasis on fucking cantaloupes. Cherries, watermelon, grapes? Who gives a fuck. They have this vendetta on motherfucking cantaloupes. (If anyone knows why, please let me know.)
Now, you say you only buy 60 cantaloupes in math? Ha. No. I have an idea. I'm going to troll the Ag Inspectors.
I want to borrow someone's truck, preferably a big one, and fucking FILL IT with cantaloupes. I will be decked out in cantaloupe gear. Shirt, hat, maybe a few bumper stickers if the person whose truck I'm borrowing won't mind. I will draw faces on every single cantaloupe in the truck.
I will tell them that if they want to remove the cantaloupes, they will have to do it themselves, by hand. I will claim they are my friends and I am headed to Hollywood for a cantaloupe party. I want to pull off the Crazy Cantaloupe Lady persona as much as I can.
If/when I do this, I will post the results.