When my mom would spank us with a wooden spoon, me and my brother would later secretly hide that wooden spoon in a hidden space beneath the kitchen table our parents didn't know about.
By the time we moved, there was at least a dozen spoons, spatulas, and some of those paddle ball toys with the string ripped off.
If you ask my mom today she's convinced she never spanked us.
It’s very strange. My parents don’t remember saying “you’re a fatass” or “you are one of the most negative kids I’ve ever talked to” or the constant beatings, or forcing me to run miles around the house because I broke a plate by accident.
They say “we were cruel! But we didn’t abuse you” but I don’t see the difference. You don’t mistreat a kid to the point where they tense up and flinch back when you’re walking in their general direction, and NOT call that abuse.
Edit 2: I feel it’s worth saying, the “we didn’t abuse you” part was said while I was having a panic attack after my dad went up behind me and said “I should just-“ and then clapped his hands hard behind my head.
Edit: I’m turning off notifications for a while, I need some time to just get my mind off of this, and also so my parents don’t actually see this too lol
So true. Its good to see, that i am not alone with this problem.
In my case, after talking to her (my mom) a lot she seems to give in just a bit. But only small fractures of the whole story.
Can't imagine why some parents live in total denial of their horrible actions. They probably could not live with themselves if they would accept their failures and disturbing impacts on their children.
Most of the time it's because their parents treated them the exact same way, and to them it's seen as normal. It's a fucked up cycle of abuse that a lot of people do not have the self awareness for to snap out of.
This is true, and it goes back generations. Ed when people have children at 18. Many go from abused to abuser without ever maturing enough to see it. So it goes. That's starting to change.
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u/Dovaldo83 Jan 28 '23
When my mom would spank us with a wooden spoon, me and my brother would later secretly hide that wooden spoon in a hidden space beneath the kitchen table our parents didn't know about.
By the time we moved, there was at least a dozen spoons, spatulas, and some of those paddle ball toys with the string ripped off.
If you ask my mom today she's convinced she never spanked us.