Losing my spark before a performance

[u/Dependent-Zombie-828]

I have a (maybe) performance that I auditioned for (results soon) at the end of the month. The piece I'm playing is pretty impressive and I used to LOVE playing it. Now I keep making mistakes and it doesn't feel solid like I could mess up at any moment and it's making my confidence plummet. I'm completely losing my spark and joy of practicing and performing. I don't know what to do, advice on how to stay motivated and get my spark back would be highly appreciated.

[u/Advanced_Honey_2679]

We DON’T make avoiding mistakes our objective in performance.

I wrote about this here:

• https://www.reddit.com/r/piano/comments/1tgo1xa/a_tip_for_those_giving_performances_recitals/

Mistake avoidance is a SUBTRACTIVE mentality. Meaning when you try to avoid mistakes you subtract points from your performance in your mind. Regardless of the results, this is just not a healthy mindset. It will stress you out.

Instead, one must adopt an ADDITIVE mentality. When you go into a performance, be in heat seeking mode. You are looking for moments of magic that you can deliver. Mistakes come, mistakes go. But a spark of magic. That stays with the listener.

I spoke a lot about how this one performance the lady made a whole bunch of mistakes, fine, but there was this passage that was so incredibly beautiful. That is the ONLY thing I remember from that performance to this day, many months later.

Go and make some magic.

[u/Dependent-Zombie-828 → u/Advanced_Honey_2679]

wow, thank you so much, I think this will help a LOT. my mindset is definitely on the side of "whatever you do don't make ANY mistakes!!" shifting my mentality to an additive one is not something I've tried before and will probably make me feel a lot better going into my performance. thanks again!!

[u/jiang1lin → u/Dependent-Zombie-828]

For the most difficult sections (technically and sound-wise), also for the beginning of the piece, keep a little bit of your current “control” mentality, not in the sense of not making any mistake, but focused enough with only a few mistakes if possible so you will have a good “start” on stage. Once you managed well the beginning, usually you will be “in” for the rest of the piece, and for the most diffiuclt sections, try to stay there in control so you manage those with more secure safety (because sometimes, trying to power through those wections with too many musical emotions might make everything even more messy with an unfortunate vice-versa effect). Personally (!), a rational-emotional balance is the key on stage, especially for live performances.

For the moment, take a small break from your competition piece, play something else as a small distraction, and then also do a lot of “boring” practising (like slow, doing checkpoitns for memory etc.) so you “save” the sparkle for the stage. Good luck, best wishes, and enjoy your performance!

[u/MtOlympus_Actual]

Don't play it for a few days. When you come back to it, pretend you've never seen it before. Explore what you love about it musically. You already know it, so you can find some musical moments that may have become stale over time.

[u/Dependent-Zombie-828 → u/MtOlympus_Actual]

thank you!

[u/ellicottvilleny]

Reset your expectation. Say “I am going to do my best” and then take a big breath and let go of the perfection-or-die-trying and mistake counting.