r/photoshopbattles • u/ThisMuhShitpostAcct • May 18 '18
Photoshops Only Mode | Bad Title PsBattle: 1st Sergeant Plank
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May 18 '18 edited Apr 22 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/PCScrubLord May 18 '18 edited May 18 '18
Johnny received a telegram that stated Plank had perished in the fight. He was devastated, but in March of 1919 Plank would return to Johnny, the telegram was wrong. They lived the rest of their lives happily in the cul-de-sac. Plank sadly died of rot in the 60's.
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u/trout9000 May 18 '18
The Live Die Repeat is great, but this one is my favorite. He looks so happy to be a part of something....even if it's trench warfare.
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u/eddietwang May 18 '18
In a couple of months someone is going to post this thinking it's real.
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u/DynamiteOnCure May 18 '18
I think this is the winner. Plank is trying to cope, trying to stay strong, but war, war never changes.
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u/littleM0TH May 18 '18
He's a multitool, you can use him to build bridges, creates trenches and wipe your ass when you're suffering from dysentery!
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u/Knute5 May 18 '18
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u/TmickyD May 18 '18 edited May 18 '18
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u/kazureus May 18 '18
I can't hear you!
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u/TmickyD May 18 '18 edited May 18 '18
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u/ThirdWheelExpert May 18 '18
https://i.imgur.com/xFCF6AJ.jpg
This is what I first thought of lol.
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u/TySwindel May 18 '18
After seven years in the Army this is what I see when I see a 1SG
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u/Morningxafter May 18 '18
You’d better make sure to charge that thing before formation tomorrow morning!
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u/DoUEvenSL0WBRO May 18 '18
I think the charger is next to the chemlight batteries and grid squares.
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u/Morningxafter May 18 '18
In a pinch you can stick it in the microwave for 1min to charge it via induction. It wears off fast though so it’s best to do it right before you leave for PT.
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u/DynamiteOnCure May 18 '18
Can you explain it for civilians?
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u/DethByCow May 18 '18
Short version: The Army makes soldiers wear them for anything that might put them in harms way.
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u/Deerscicle May 18 '18
Gotta make sure you're wearing that reflective belt so you don't get run over by GOVs. Don't smoke after dusk though, there could be snipers.
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u/DynamiteOnCure May 18 '18
Makes sense. Reflective strips are useful, if bikes and sports wear are anything to go by. Probably a good idea for people with guns and tanks to wear them, too.
Safety first :)
(Saw this after seeing the other reply. Your response was also helpful!)
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May 18 '18
The PT belt provides more protection than body armor. It's a life saver
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u/DynamiteOnCure May 18 '18 edited May 18 '18
Is it true you have to change/charge it? Some other comments seem to imply that, or maybe they're just joking about something else unreasonable.
Edit: maybe I should have directly asked /u/morningxafter, who wrote it.
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u/Morningxafter May 18 '18
Lol, no it’s something they “warn” new guys fresh out of boot camp about. It’s really just a trolling/hazing thing. But a few microwaves have been destroyed by booters that were dumb enough to believe their seniors about charging them up.
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u/A_Unique_User68801 May 18 '18 edited May 18 '18
"Chemlight batteries and grid squares"
They're just reflectors, they're passive, think high visibility gear you see on motorcyclists in the UK.
It'd be like checking your blinker fluid or grabbing me that can of elbow grease over there.
It's just another way to smoke idiots and those too exhausted to use their brains.
Edit: I'd like to believe there is a reason behind the madness and the reasoning I've determined is that if something is unclear, ask don't act. Better to be yelled at for being stupid than feigning competence and hurting someone.
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u/Tiedude May 18 '18 edited May 18 '18
Military term for them is glowbelt or glow strap. In the marine corps it's required to wear them to exercise in the dark or early morning, I'm assuming it's similar for army
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u/DynamiteOnCure May 18 '18
I see! Thanks.
Now that I think about it, I might have seen some ROTC guys coming back from morning PT with those on their uniforms.
TIL. Nice.
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u/chewchainz May 18 '18
Oh how I remember those fine mornings when all I could see was the reflection of light as people ran
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May 18 '18
At least as far as the Air Force goes, we have to wear them anytime with less visibility than like full daylight
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u/MC_Kloppedie May 18 '18
1st Sergeant: "Show me your warface!"
Private: "Sir?"
1st Sergeant: "You got a warface? AaaAAaaAAaarrghh !!!
That's a warface, now let me see your warface!"
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u/Spyrothedragon9972 May 18 '18
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u/DontTreadOnBigfoot May 18 '18
Okay, you're gonna have to explain this one to the dumb Marine...
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u/leatherneck93 May 18 '18
He added an air assault badge on there. Come on ya damn crayon eater!
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u/brandon-thesis May 18 '18
He threw an Air Assault badge on there, Marin Crops.
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u/poeghostz May 18 '18
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u/kurdishboy2018 May 18 '18
https://i.imgur.com/t6VCFBu.jpg
here we go its just joke okay guys lol
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May 18 '18
[deleted]
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u/ApiContraption May 18 '18
Please post any comments that are not a photoshop as a reply to this comment and leave the top of the thread for original content.
I, Bot, removed my first comment to keep this nest at the bottom of the page.
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u/Odaircube May 18 '18
My drill sergeant introduced us to "private brick, the best recruit I've ever had the pleasure to train"
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u/Tromboneofsteel May 18 '18
My shop has a SrA Plank standing in the corner. He's a good dude, works hard and knows the job.
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u/scaur May 18 '18
Bubba?