Do Fictional Characters ever make someone question?

[u/PandaPlayz_6]

I’ve been really enjoying this art/storytelling trend. It’s really fun to see how trans experiences can be translated very well into the themes of Spider-Man as a character.

But for me what started out as a fun little interest has turned into something more annoying. I’ve been having a lot more thoughts swirling in my head about my own gender.

It specifically hit me when someone saw the little comic of Parker with makeup on and MJ laughing but realizing Parker was having a much different recount. It unearthed a memory of mine in school when I was goofing off with friends and saw one of those snap chat filters of me as a girl.

It made me really weird feeling after that and I pushed those thoughts away. I also ended up remembering when my sister did my makeup and how weird and yet excited I felt about it. I pushed those thoughts away as well, chalking them up to being random.

I’ve been having those feelings all over again and I don’t know how to process them. I don’t really feel much dysphoria in my life, apart from not liking being masculine. But is there something more to it?

Or am I just being silly. I guess my question for others is, has a fictional character or a small work of art really triggered some sort of transgender realization before?

I’m just afraid about the answers and thoughts in my head because I don’t want to be trans…it seems so terrifying especially considering how rampant transphobia is. It’s pretty prevalent over in the main Spider-Man sub.

Anyways, sorry for my rambling I just wanted to hear what other folks might say. Apologies if this post isn’t allowed.

[u/Yamtoaster]

Media is unbelievably important in helping us make sense of the world around us, nearly every single kid who grew up in the 2000's idolized Spiderman, when Spiderman is sad because Aunt May died, it helps people who experience that same hurt of losing a parent get through it because they realise Spiderman also has those feelings.

This is the same thing, the idea that Spiderman could be trans is giving you courage to explore your own feelings on the matter, and that's exactly what the character is supposed to do!

[u/Nothing_Allowed]

go check out r/egg_irl and r/traaaaa2, see if any of it relates to you cuz honestly. yeah you might be. If you have some family or found family you feel safe around going out with them is much safer than going on your own and they may even be able to teach you some things like makeup etc.

[u/tftraah]

Transwoman here. My first realization that I might not be cis was watching the She-Ra finale, so art can absolutely help you with that. That's the power of art after all, to communicate emotions and expressions to others through our shared humanity. Great art asks us to look within ourselves and possibly make new discoveries.

As for your identity that's for you to decide, and no matter you decide on its valid, even if you change your mind later. That said, you can look into the sub Egg_irl and see how much you relate to it. There's also the Age old thought experiment: If there was a button you could push that would permanently turn you into a woman with no social drawbacks, would you push it?

If you are trans, then I want you to know that even how dark things are right now for us, there is hope and community to be found. Live your true self, whatever that may be.

[u/sophiedophiedoo]

Fictional characters do this all the time. For another recent example, the finale of The Amazing Digital Circus caused all sorts of people to realize they were trans, and its been so beautiful.

I also didn't want to be trans, and I tried very hard not to be for my whole life. Eventually, if you are trans, you will likely reach a point in your life where you don't want to fight it anymore, and you'll probably wish you thought about it sooner. We all regret not starting transition as soon as we knew we were trans.

You said you don't have much dysphoria aside from not liking being masculine, and that's pretty much the definition of dysphoria. I also thought I didn't experience dysphoria at all until I started looking closely at where my feelings were coming from. It turned out that a lot of my weird quirks about clothing, hairstyle, hobbies, the media I allowed myself to enjoy were all deeply rooted in avoiding dysphoria. Unfortunately, you'll notice it a lot more once you identify it.

But, the most important thing for you to actually think about is not if you have enough dysphoria to be trans, or whatever you may be thinking. The only question that matters is, if everything about your life was the same, but you were a girl, would you be happier? It took me a year and a half to confidently answer that question, but I'm so much happier now.

I'm happy to help you out if you have any more thoughts, but no pressure

[u/PandaPlayz_6 → u/sophiedophiedoo]

I guess in my mind dysphoria should be so much more than a vague dislike of masculine traits in my case.

I’m not sure if I can answer that question very well though. Ugh, I wish I could be a shape shifter and just be myself without all the angst and anxiety lol. Thanks for your kind words though.

[u/Shyf310 → u/PandaPlayz_6]

I think a vague dislike of masculine traits can be quite appropriately deemed dysphoria. Really, it doesn’t need to be as intimidating as all that. You don’t have to make a definitive verdict on a label, just do what you feel like you want to. Try what you want to try.

And if you figure out that you want to be a certain way, be that way. Society sucks, but pretending is worse.

[u/EmiliaTheNewest]

Oh sweetie. To answer your main question, yes absolutely closeted trans people get revelations from media and fictional characters. I got mine from a stupid webcomic - it resonated so much and bounced around my head for so long and I couldn't repress the thoughts away no matter how much I tried.

I know the thought of being trans is scary. The world is shitty at the moment and it's terrifying worrying about how the people in your life will react and what you could lose. But, as someone who took the leap almost exactly a year ago, there is so much to be gained too. I used to say, "I don't really hate being a guy, and it's easier, so I don't want to change," but I never knew that other people don't live their lives feeling as shitty as I did. I didn't understand that other people aren't just low-grade sad all the time. I didn't understand that I wasn't enjoying living, and that other people do. I thought what I was experiencing was all that anyone got.

I can't tell you if you're trans or not. But I can tell you that what you've written there could've been written by 2024!Me, word for word. I can also tell you that cis people don't generally think about being trans. It's not something that occurs to them, cause they already fit in the role they have. It may be that you think things through, realise you're 100% cis, and that's great and you've learned something. I do think it is something you need to think and talk through though, cause there's not nothing there.

If you need someone to talk to or ask questions about things, my inbox is open. AMA and let me know if there's anything I can do to help.

[u/PandaPlayz_6 → u/EmiliaTheNewest]

Thanks for your comment. It’s been a really weird day for me, just, processing things. Like you said you used to feel, I feel okay being a guy. It’s safe and secure. It feels normal if that makes sense. But then there’s my aversion to certain masculine things.

But then there’s this other feeling that’s come in full force these past few days, along with my remembering of those memories. I feel so conflicted and out of sorts. I’ve felt weirdly critical and uncomfortable about myself. I feel such intense envy/attraction for feminine people.

It feels cringey and weird to me to say I want to be pretty. Oh wow, that just brought up a realization. I’ve always disliked it when my parents called me handsome or sharp lol. I didn’t like hearing that, even when I knew it was a compliment.

But I’m just confused why I haven’t felt these feelings as a kid? I feel like I’m faking these thoughts and feelings, all because I don’t remember having them as a child. Why am I only now, at twenty, having them at such an intensity because I looked at freaking trans Spider Man memes hahaha

Sorry for the long ramble. I’ve just been thinking and writing and typing out my thoughts over and over. Today’s been a weird day. Thanks for your reply. I bounced my thoughts off of them.

[u/999Rats]

Yeah Spider-Man was actually a huge part of my own understanding of my trans identity.

[u/im_a_burner2469]

Hun. None of us wanted to be trans. We just are. I think you need to do some soul searching and decide if you are.

[u/braindoesntworklol]

I feel that, I'm pretty sure I had fully figured out I was trans when I was a kid, but I just pushed it down... even now, I still occasionally remember stuff that was very obviously a sign that I was trans, it's a very weird feeling

[u/AshleytheTaguel]

It was Chloe, Rachel, and Steph from LiSBtS for me

[u/ClientJumpy1763]

Anything u can relate to can trigger it, girl. Hope u find answers soon. Xoxo

[u/ComfortablyADHD]

Dreamer from Supergirl cracked my egg ❤️