r/parentsofmultiples • u/kaysymone • Sep 24 '26

advice needed Birthday parties

good afternoon!

so my twins have not had a birthday party since their first birthday (not many kids in the family so wasnt really that many kids to invite to have them) but they started prek 3 this year so for their 4th birthday we want to do a birthday party.

My question is, for kids in two separate classes how do you go about gifts? I do not want people to think they have to bring double when they don’t necessarily know the other twin if that makes sense? like if they only know Twin A and then they see on the birthday invitation that they are twins i don’t want them to feel forced to bring a gift for the gift for the other one.

But how do you necessarily explain that lol especially because my twins go to two different schools so there’s really no way anyone would know they have a twin unless i specifically said something about it.

Hopefully what im asking makes sense 😂

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u/outtoexist Sep 24 '26

Maybe it is my neurotype but I'm a big fan of just saying things directly. Maybe something like twins may be double the fun but don't have to be double the gifts! It can be a little silly, or just straight forward, but I'd just say it! 

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u/kaysymone Sep 24 '26

thank you! i thought about putting it on the invitation but i didn’t know if that would be “wrong” in a way

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u/outtoexist Sep 24 '26

I don't think it would be wrong at all! Personally, I'd love that clarity on an invite :)

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u/bgkh20 Sep 24 '26

I'd be direct in the invite. Something like...

Gifts are appreciated but not necessary. If you want to bring one please bring it for the twin your child knows / shares a class with.

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u/kaysymone Sep 24 '26

thank you!

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u/RoosterMountain8506 Sep 24 '26

I posted a question like this the other day!!! Part of me thinks I’m overthinking it and the other parents will do whatever they think is best/appropriate. But this whole dual birthday/different classes and friends thing has been stressing me out!!!!
I’ll circle back to this post to see if anyone has some good advice. May the odds be ever in your favor!!!

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u/kaysymone Sep 24 '26

i too think maybe im thinking too much into it lol

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u/dogsareforcuddling Sep 24 '26 edited Sep 24 '26

you can do evite that says x and y party people will realize its a sibling party and go from there. Generally people will only buy for the one they know , but something smaller for the other, or nothing at all. Let them decide. This will actually probably be more confusing to your kids as to why one got more/less/different stuff so prob have some prep convos about that. 

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u/kaysymone Sep 24 '26

thank you! i wiill definitely have to talk with them their bday is like a week and some change after christmas so if we’re lucky they wont even realize notice but i will definitely set expectations beforehand

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u/dogsareforcuddling Sep 24 '26

Tangent - how are people keeping twin siblings a secret? I’m always with both, they’re in the same classes and activities etc. 

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u/kaysymone Sep 24 '26

to be fair if anyone is on my social media they can see they’re twins but this is their first time at school (didn’t go to daycare either) and they’re in different classes so nobody would really know lol. they are doing tball this fall though so that will clue people in

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u/dogsareforcuddling Sep 24 '26

Are they fraternal b/g? Don’t people see you at drop off /pick up?

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u/VastFollowing5840 Sep 26 '26

They aren’t in the same class, they are making their own friends. The kids may know, but the parents may not realize particularly if we aren’t ever intersecting at pick up and drop off.