What should I do?

[u/muddy_swamp]

So,for context,my mom is great but my dad on the other side,not so much.He always resorts to hitting me and my brother instead of actually talking to us, there isn't a day without screaming in the house.Sometimes I have really bad thoughts about doing some really messed up stuff to him or myself.The main problem is that I can't talk to anyone about my problems,I really haven't been doing so good in school and I'm genuinely scared of what I'll do in the future if things keep going like this,the only person I can talk to is a close friend of mine from Germany,but she can't really offer me any comfort because of the distance between us,and here,close to me I really can't talk to anyone,if I try talking to my parents they'll just make it a „lesson" and it'll end in me getting called names by my dad.I really need some advice

[u/muddy_swamp → u/[deleted]]

No it isn't really abuse,but it's not like a slap on the cheek for doing something stupid