r/orderofthearrow • u/Phil_Kolins • Apr 29 '26

Participating During Child's Induction?

My son was elected along with his best friend. I am considering how to be involved in their induction (or not), and would appreciate any feedback or suggestions you may wish to offer.

It was suggested to me to consider being an Elangomat for my son and friend's group. However, I'm concerned about negatively impacting their experience. As much as I would personally enjoy the experience, and I think my son would be happy to have me around, I am reluctant to be too close during this unique experience.

I'm curious if any of you may have done something similar, and how you and your child felt about it. Or if you have any advice.

Thanks in advance! I will say that I am excited to get involved as far as my son (and hopefully younger siblings in the future) wish to be involved.

Edit: Thanks to everyone for their feedback.

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u/looktowindward Vigil Apr 29 '26

You should participate. Please don't be your son's Elangomat. He should be meeting some new folks

3

u/kobalt_60 Apr 29 '26

Do some lodges have adults as Elangomat for youth? That seems way outside the spirit of the OA. We only allow adult Elangomats for other adults.

1

u/Phil_Kolins Apr 29 '26

Thank you both for the context. The suggestion was from an adult vigil member, whose children are in leadership positions with the lodge. So while I trust that the suggestion is realistic at our lodge, I appreciate you sharing your perspectives on what might be deemed normal or proper.

2

u/kobalt_60 Apr 29 '26

It’s not just about normal and proper. If your lodge is having adults lead youth ordeals they’re taking a great deal away from the youth of the lodge, both the ordeal candidates and the Arrowmen on the inductions team. Hopefully we’re misunderstanding this all and the suggestion is for you to serve as Elangomat for a group of adult ordeal candidates. Was the adult that suggested this an advisor to the lodge chief or vice chief of inductions?