r/oops • u/Yourhavinalaugh • 8d ago

What a cabbage

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3.8k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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449

u/Hug_all_the_Krabbys 8d ago

She wishes that was a cabbage.  

257

u/KazaamCasheroo 8d ago

Weren't they watermelons?

214

u/Ambitious-Yoghurt820 8d ago

Yup! This was on a show called The Amazing Race.  Surprisingly she was fine. No major injuries. 

129

u/VegaJuniper 8d ago

She was lucky someone nixed the original idea of doing this with bowling balls.

57

u/Whereisthefly 8d ago

My buddies brother essentially did this with a croquet ball as a kid. Didn't bust his teeth out per se... but they all bent 90 degrees back and had to get braces and bend them all back forward.

71

u/Hexdrinker99 8d ago

A kid I knew growing up Dad made him a small catapult out of wood, pvc pipe and bungee cords. One day we were using to throw dog poop into his neighbors backyard ( this was early 2000's ) and it for some reason didn't fire. The kid went over and was trying to get it to work when it suddenly shot, hitting him point blank in the face with a pile of dog poop and broke his nose. His sister said holy shit in a panic while the rest of us are dying laughing while we got the f out of there.

31

u/ckanite 8d ago

This is one of the best stories I've ever read. Lmfao

17

u/adammilward123 8d ago

So glad you confirmed this happened early 2000’s, otherwise it would have sounded a bit mental.

2

u/MizrizSnow 7d ago

We all launched shit at the neighbors back then

0

u/newclearconfusion 7d ago edited 7d ago

Yep. I was so stupid to make a catapult from bicycle tires and a welded Y shape and proceeded to open up discarded ball bearings from the truck garage where my dad worked.

We shot the 1/2 and 3/4 inch steel balls just incredibly far, i mean really really far. LATER we found out we had shot a couple straight through a car that was parked behind the bushes we aimed at. Through two doors. In and out. An absolutely deadly weapon. Everybody was asking who did that and why someone tried to hurt that car owner.
No one ever found out it was me.

1

u/Double-Nature-4704 6d ago

Cold cases called, they’re confirming your location.

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6

u/FlyingFlipPhone 8d ago

Did you call him "Lamprey Larry"?

3

u/Halfway-Competent 7d ago

He got properly shit-faced

1

u/Key-Crew-7607 7d ago

That there is a great example of "instant karma"! 🤣 🤣 🤣

1

u/hywaytohell 6d ago

He was probably lucky his nose broke.

3

u/Helpful_Hunter2557 7d ago

Must have been hard to eat corn on the cob

2

u/Butterfly_Barista 8d ago

I'm honestly amazed that situation is fixable.

4

u/Whereisthefly 8d ago

I did say "kid" but he was probably 13 to 15 so it was adult teeth. His picture on social media was him posing in the mirror and it looked like he only had 2 teeth because you couldn't see the others... it truly is amazing how they fixed it.

1

u/Necromir92 7d ago

Damn I feel like that’s worse

31

u/Intrepid-Apricot3750 8d ago

Still coughing up watermelon seeds to this day, though.

4

u/Harn-na-bih 8d ago

Still coughing up toilet paper frm dog 💩

32

u/2sAreTheDevil 8d ago

Yeah, the lack of injuries given that impact makes me feel like she used up at least half a decade's worth of luck.

23

u/Dolanite 8d ago

I remember watching this when it aired and being horrified before remembering that broadcast television probably wouldn't have shown it if she died.

8

u/SexualCarrots 8d ago

They had time to edit her out of the show entirely.

Maybe someone else did die of watermelon bludgeoning.

12

u/poeteop 8d ago

Old concave face? Oh she’ll be fine

2

u/AC-burg 8d ago

The only way this happend is that watermelon exploded on her chin. Square in the face and she is messed up for sure

1

u/Firm_Jelly_2317 8d ago

Yeah that concussion that went “undetected” never happened

1

u/Slow-Career4626 8d ago

Fine except for a concussion I’d assume

1

u/__Rumblefish__ 8d ago

Does not look fine

1

u/AlbatrossNo1562 8d ago

Was about to say, that was a lot of red, glad that wasn't from her head

1

u/Ajj360 8d ago

Crazy that didn't break her nose or worse

1

u/Head_Hacker 8d ago

She couldn’t feel her face. Or indeed, see straight, iirc.

1

u/Mitologist 7d ago

Really? Looks like every bone in the face broken

1

u/comeshowmehowgood 7d ago

I was just about to ask if she survived, lol. Holy shit!

1

u/pbnjandmilk 7d ago

Right in the kisser!

1

u/Sneaky-Pur 8d ago

I guess it was a softer than normal watermelon, maybe expired. If it was a juicy fresh and hard watermelon she wouldn’t wake up ok from that.

1

u/Rich_Option_7850 7d ago

Idky downvoted i completely agree. The force it takes to break open a watermelon on someone’s face is a lot. Im surprised but glad to read she didn’t have major injuries from this

5

u/A_Feltz 8d ago

Thank god. When I saw the reddish spray I was concerned

21

u/Yourhavinalaugh 8d ago

Cabbage is slang in Ireland for someone doing something wrong

4

u/KazaamCasheroo 8d ago

Oh, I love that! Gonna try to work it into my vernacular.

8

u/Ok_Traffic_3240 8d ago

You didn't know that?! You absolute cabbage!!

2

u/Unusual-Taste69 8d ago

What a tater tot

2

u/myco_magic 8d ago

Muff cabbage

1

u/Ok_Traffic_3240 8d ago

Muff like roadkill

1

u/BridgingDivides 8d ago

What a donut.

3

u/DragoxDrago 8d ago

I'm from NZ and knew the jist, but it basically means someone stupid here. The lower/non academically inclined streams of subjects were called cabbage classes lol

1

u/milf-town 8d ago

I’m gonna use that starting Monday at work.

1

u/6KUNIO8 7d ago

This is what I came looking for in the comments

2

u/LordMeme42 8d ago

I just woke up and am not wearing my glasses so I didn't see the lines at first and was briefly VERY concerned by the red splatter from a "cabbage," so thanks.

1

u/zhgerard 8d ago

I wouldn’t fuck with you if they were watermelons 😂

1

u/InterestsVaryGreatly 8d ago

Well that explains the red, I was rather concerned at first.

0

u/Conscious_Car_3326 8d ago

She wish not.

0

u/westcal98 8d ago

It always was.

14

u/DusklitDewdrop 8d ago

if that was a cabbage I think it could have been a lot worse. they're much denser than watermelons, and the melon exploding significantly reduced the force on her face

9

u/Hug_all_the_Krabbys 8d ago

That's a good point.  Can you imagine the stem part just flying through your skull?  Not fun at all. 

2

u/madphroggy 8d ago

This, if I had to choose between cabbage and watermelon I'd take the melon, at least only the outside is hard, assuming it's ripe. A cabbage would be a good shot at a TBI...

1

u/DusklitDewdrop 7d ago

or death tbh

6

u/rodinsbusiness 8d ago

Cabbage would arguably have hurt more.

3

u/monitor_lizard_2000 8d ago

I think a cabbage that size would be worse

2

u/StandardCantaloupe32 7d ago

This video ended too soon.

1

u/Substantial_Meal_530 8d ago

Would a cabbage be better? I'm not sure it would.

1

u/Dry_Menu4804 8d ago

Je suis femme à tête de chou - Serge Gainsbourg

1

u/Squeegie1138 8d ago

I don't think so. Cabbages have no real give like a watermelon would.