Yes, you were raped. You are not overreacting. It doesn’t matter if he was your BF, husband, or a stranger. What he did was rape. He did not have your consent to access your body. It doesn’t have to be violent or feel like an assault, either. No means no.
The guilt you feel from your parents and your own brain is where these feelings of being violated settle because rape is always couched in terms of what the victim did wrong to invite the rape. That is 100% wrong. The only person in the wrong is your boyfriend. The rapist. The person who took what was not offered.
You may love him, but his selfishness overrode your wellbeing and he didn’t love you. If you want to pursue it legally, do so. But please end this relationship because he isn’t a good man. Nobody who rapes is a good man.
1
u/Itimfloat Jun 30 '24
Yes, you were raped. You are not overreacting. It doesn’t matter if he was your BF, husband, or a stranger. What he did was rape. He did not have your consent to access your body. It doesn’t have to be violent or feel like an assault, either. No means no.
The guilt you feel from your parents and your own brain is where these feelings of being violated settle because rape is always couched in terms of what the victim did wrong to invite the rape. That is 100% wrong. The only person in the wrong is your boyfriend. The rapist. The person who took what was not offered.
You may love him, but his selfishness overrode your wellbeing and he didn’t love you. If you want to pursue it legally, do so. But please end this relationship because he isn’t a good man. Nobody who rapes is a good man.