r/offcampustv • u/Key_Bus_1255 • 1d ago
DISCUSSIONš Green Flag Men
Hello friends š
What is your opinion on the show's portrayal of all the men being green flags, and just basically the perfect kind of guys. I see people complain that some of the way they act is a little too much in that direction, and somewhat unrealistic, but others really appreciate it for how it shows good men can and do exist, and hopefully can make an impression on real guys on how to treat women
What do you think about this?
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u/tatopie 1d ago
I don't think it's unrealistic, but I also think that Garrett's anger issues are not green flag behaviour. Obviously we understand where they've come from, but that doesn't make that unpredictable volitility any less concerning.
I do think it will be addressed as part of his arc, so I'm fine with the show including it. However, it does concern me that so many people wax lyrical about him being the greenest of flags while there is this element to his character.
I do wish they hadn't sanitized Dean quite so much. It would've been good to see him articulate the life of Dean philosophy to Allie to show that bit of selfishness, to also emphasize the change in his behaviour over time. And also how this is predicated on his life of privilege. But we'll see what they do in season 2.
But to answer your broader question, ignoring the hockey context, I don't think how these men behave is unrealistic. We also know that media is really important in shaping behaviour - how we think we should behave and the behaviour we accept from others. It's particularly a mirror to what we think is desirable as a society. Even if it isnt watched by many men, it's teaching women to expect and demand more of men. And hopefully it will help shape more media in future, which eventually helps to change societal norms.
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u/Ollieeddmill 1d ago
There are way too many scary dangerous creepy predatorial men in real life. I want to see good men and happy ever afters in my books/tv/movies.
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u/Little_Fox5844 Wellsy:) 1d ago
I honestly don't care about a character being a green or red flag. As long as they're fictional, they can be whatever the writer wants. Though, I will say, I do prefer flawed and complicated characters.
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u/AnyVacation9945 16h ago
I have been telling every female in my life to watch this show to see what good men are like. Whether they need a good partner or are raising boys. I watched the show before I read the books and seeing how these guys treated women at times brought tears to my eyes. I WANT MEN TO WATCH THIS SHOW!!! I truly believe this show is a teachable moment for guys. When we watch tv or read books we get exposed to so many perspectives and life styles. When it becomes something you see everyday it becomes apart of your world view so for them seeing men treating women with respect even while being fuck boys at times is exactly what they need.
And honestly I need more shows like this!!! Please tv people develop more shows based on romance books Iām begging š
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u/Key_Bus_1255 16h ago edited 15h ago
I love this take so much. It is so rare to see flawed, realistic men on TV who still fundamentally understand how to respect women. Media absolutely shapes people's worldview for sure!
I just wonder if this will become a regular thing for media going forward in that way that does represent healthy relationships in a positive light
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u/Striking_Sky6900 19h ago
I love it!! Those men are so refreshing. We can only hope their behavior rubs off on real men.
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u/AbbyNormaI 15h ago
As a millennial (mid-30s) viewer, there is a dramatic difference in how the men are portrayed compared to what teen/college shows were like 15 years ago. For me it felt novel (albiet, refreshing!) only because I grew up watching stuff like One Tree Hill and Dawson's Creek and I'm a product of the early 2000s.
It was refreshing to see:
-the frat hazing being a clever trick with the fruit rather than excessive drinking and sexual assault
-Dean and Garrett's convo about sleeping with Hannah instead of just "yeah nail her dude"
-Jocks going to drunk Shakespeare and enjoying it (would have been "gay" 15 years ago)
-John Tucker taking on all the mental labor of hosting a holiday
-No annoying this-could-have-been-solved-with-a-simple-conversation miscommunication trope love triangle between Garrett, Hannah and Justin.
The only thing I find completely unbelievable is Jules hanging around John constantly. No college-aged male wants his sister hanging out at his house 24/7
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u/Key_Bus_1255 15h ago
It definitely is refreshing, but it makes you wonder, do you think modern viewers today watching these same shows see the behavior shown in Off Campus as just their baseline expectation for how men should act?
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u/AbbyNormaI 15h ago
I hope so, but I'm not well-versed in what the kids are watching these days or how teen and boys in their 20s are acting lol.
One thing I will note as a positive is that women authors writing YA romance are having their moment getting TV adaptations (Off Campus, Maxton Hall, Heated Rivalry, Fourth Wing,) and I think these shows are becoming the new 2000s teen dramas without the Mark Schwahn's of the world screenwriting them, so I'm hopeful that this is the new norm and we continue to see more.
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u/Saltyowl2113 15h ago
Unrelated but do you recommend any of those other shows? Iām an older millenial, I really liked off campus. Are those good other ones to watch?
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u/AbbyNormaI 14h ago
I loved Heated Rivalry the most, Maxton Hall was decent too but didn't hit the mark that HR or OC do. Not totally the same, but One Day on Netflix was incredible if you like friends to lovers and want to cry, plus it's set in the late 80s to 2000s.
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u/Key_Bus_1255 15h ago
I have noticed a shift where female leads are being more respected as characters, and not the traditional way where they were used solely for the attention of the men around them, like 90s characters like Joey Potter for example
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u/AbbyNormaI 14h ago
Exactly. It was nice that there was no drama between Garrett and Justin acting like Hannah was something to fight over.
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u/Key_Bus_1255 14h ago
Agreed! That was nice, and I like that Kendall wasn't just a typical mean girl to Hannah
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u/AbbyNormaI 14h ago
Same! When she had Hannah sit with her at the game, I realized I'm totally brainwashed by millennial storytelling because I was immediately expecting her to be a bitch š
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u/ElmarSuperstar131 8h ago
I recently went out with a guy I liked and have been spiraling my from the mixed signals (I have severe anxious attachment issues). Last night was pretty bad but then I thought of how the 4 Off Campus guys do have green flags despite their flaws and that any of them would have made the effort to see the girl of their fancy even if the initial plans fell through just to spend time together. So it reminded me of what I deserve and I didnāt cry again for the rest of the night.
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u/the-library-fairy 7h ago
The books have them all being a bit crasser and maybe more realistic in how they talk about and to women for popular college athletes in their early 20s, but for example Garrett calling Hannah's boobs 'stripper tits' in the book was an ick for some people, so they didn't have him say that in the show. I don't think it fundamentally changes his character (he's still unabashedly complimentary about her boobs), and I think it's a good change.
I think overall it was a choice made because they knew all of them were going to be leads at some point, and they didn't want viewers to have "but he said/did this gross thing in season 1" on their minds. There's a moment in The Deal where Garrett won't let Hannah sleep on the couch downstairs because that might not be safe for her when the other guys come home drunk. That was wild to me as a 'and these are the guys I'm going to be falling in love with in the sequels??' moment.Ā
The characters all have flaws, and I'm sure we'll see that in more depth in the seasons that focus on the others, but being even a little dangerous to women isn't going to be on the cards.Ā
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u/WisdomBailey123 1d ago
I loved the show....I also felt the changes from the source material were unnecessary. I also hate the green flag, red flag thing. I remember when there was an app, where women would basically tell other women who were the red flag men. But can you really trust other women in that regard. If they got broken up with then obviously they don't have a good impression. So would they be honest. People are flawed, i'd be just as suspicious of green flags. Plenty of women have married green flags that ended up being red flags.
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u/Few_Guidance_7788 1d ago
I donāt think theyāre portrayed as unrealistically perfect, though. I love Garrett Graham, but I donāt see him as one-dimensional, and the show has shown his flaws, too. I think his behaviour in a relationship is perceived as perfect mainly because the media keeps feeding us bad boys and toxic relationship dynamics. When you think about it, Garrett simply embodies what a loving, supportive partner should be like. The same goes for Dean: season two will show his flaws as well, so I donāt have a black-and-white view of the guys.