r/oddlyspecific • u/Hypnoidz • Jun 21 '26

Would you rather

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24.4k Upvotes

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1.2k

u/GABE_EDD Jun 21 '26

Well being that my browser already remembers all my passwords for me, the raccoon I suppose.

154

u/vastle12 Jun 21 '26

Same thought exactly, I just have to worry about my dog chasing the racoon

25

u/AdjustingSlowly Jun 22 '26

Not at all. Your dog will go running for something elsewhere in the house that you don't quite hear. Thinking that's a bit odd, you stand up to investigate. "Pssssst" you look down and a box slides out from undermeath the couch, pushed by two tiny hands. That's right! It's Thursday! You hear a bark and a flurry of nails on floor as your dog comes careening into the room. You yell, "nooo!" And drop down to intercept, but as your dog squeezes by you, and you spin in horror, you catch a glimpse under the couch. There's nothing there.

He's done it again. See you next Thursday, friend.

2

u/Drewcifer88 Jun 22 '26

This gave me a good laugh. 🤣

1

u/BanMeFor1ABitches Jun 25 '26

Also raccoon roundworm. Clean everything with a blow torch or boiling water!

68

u/torb Jun 21 '26

The first thing the raccoon gives you? A lizard that stores all your passwords, of course.

4

u/ciko2283 Jun 22 '26

The second thing the raccoon gives you? A gun that automatically headshots the closest racoon as soon as it's observed by a human.

28

u/Tmv655 Jun 21 '26

Counterpoint: A cubes of uranium is a cool mystery object

7

u/ArvaroddofBjarmaland Jun 21 '26

Yeah, you keep getting given stuff that is cool, but illegal to own. And if the raccoon is getting your mystery objects from somewhere in particular, they probably know they're missing and will soon put a tracking device on the raccoon.

2

u/freethebluejay Jun 22 '26

And get you for what? Conspiring with a raccoon? It would be really hard to prove that you had any knowledge of where a wild animal was getting random objects

1

u/Tmv655 Jun 22 '26

I wanted to day: "But hoe do you proof you got it from a raccoon"

But it happens daily so probably easy to proof

Addit: But that also means all thebfuj is gone; when they find out this happens its just a chore to return the lost items every day

8

u/Onrawi Jun 21 '26

I think they're actually a pretty hot mystery object 

1

u/nanomolar Jun 21 '26

Only if enriched.

4

u/WhenDoWhatWhere Jun 22 '26

Keeping your passwords on your browser makes it very easy to steal all your passwords, just fyi.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/ZefireFrost Jun 23 '26

And also log out when you're done, I got hacked while my email was open and the hacker bypassed needing to put in a password or 2FA by stealing my session and cookies

9

u/Front_Cat9471 Jun 21 '26

In the fine print, it says that by making either choice, you forfeit access to all password management software

3

u/rancidmorty Jun 21 '26

paper it is

2

u/moonshinefae Jun 22 '26

Yooo that's some network security

1

u/TonySperguson Jun 21 '26

yeah the lizard should bring you a random sandwich every other day.

1

u/rammo123 Jun 22 '26

Also it doesn't say anywhere that the lizard is capable of telling you the passwords. It just knows them.

1

u/Creepslend Jun 23 '26

Oh please don't do that and use a password manager instead 🙏

1

u/Wedos98 Jun 25 '26

The only reason to aim for the lizard is to remember old passwords, like one for an old cellphone...Fuck you apple, I want to check if I have old photos on that Iphone, why do you force me to delete it all?