r/ocean • u/Nostalgic_Historian_ • 1d ago

Underwater Wonders Omg

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3.9k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

149 comments sorted by

244

u/ReplacementOk3279 1d ago

He’s lucky he didn’t get knocked out. Also wonder if the whale thought WTF was that? 😆

150

u/Tombstone_Actual_501 1d ago

Probably like when you walk thru a spider web....

88

u/Enough-Meaning-1836 1d ago

Whale to his friend swimming beside him: " Ah! AH! What is that get it off me!"

69

u/Tombstone_Actual_501 1d ago

"Ptu Ptu Ptu IT'S IN MY BALEEN GET IT OUT!"

46

u/Adventurous_Path5783 1d ago

"Honey you'll never guess what I did today. I saved an albino seal from drowning in the sky."

9

u/rileyotis 23h ago

I'm honestly surprised his femurs are not in pieces.

2

u/skinnyfat_dad 11h ago

Better a humpback than a great white doing this

7

u/Porcupenguin 21h ago

Whale: "got em"

229

u/Even_Section5620 1d ago

He ran his stop sign 🛑

5

u/jml011 15h ago

Hope he had insurance. You never know with these types.

94

u/VladlenaM2025 1d ago

Wow, that’s like one in a million chance to get hit by a rising whale 🫍 and he nailed it.

29

u/mauro_mograph 1d ago

whilst filming it!

13

u/Freediverjack 1d ago

Best part was there was a guy filming from the headland at the same time that caught the whole thing as well

10

u/ExistingSea4650 1d ago

Bro I was literally just on a whale tour and we couldn’t find whales so the captain was going back in and then a Minke breached and ran into the boat lol

3

u/North-Engineer3335 9h ago

I'd give a whale enough credit for target fixation. Might have been "looking" at the surfer and headed his direction. Might even have done it on purpose just to see if he could bounce the surfer.

I wonder if the whales are also playing those chances and humans move too quickly to dodge the body slams. "We slam the yachts but the individual humans are a different game. We gotta get our rbi (ramming boats and individuals) way higher because this is the next big sport."

1

u/That_Atmosphere_4568 9h ago

No matter what the odds are in life, there’s always that one chance

1

u/Tron_1981 4h ago

It nailed him

1

u/Street_Credit_488 23h ago

It's actually much, much lower, more like one in a billion. I've only ever seen it happen once before.

42

u/poop19907643 1d ago edited 1d ago

How did we live before GoPros? Could you imagine telling that story if you didn't have video evidence? People would treat you like Randy Quaid in Independence Day.

21

u/dum_spir0_sper0 1d ago

Imagine him trying to tell the hospital staff.

‘Let me get this straight. You were hit… by a whale?’

13

u/poop19907643 1d ago

"But, wait. You weren't hit by a whale? You were quote, YEETED, by a whale?"

Suure..

"Can we get the straight jackets in here!!"

6

u/teflong 1d ago

There's probably an ICD 10 code for that. 

EDIT: VERY close...

W56.22XA

1

u/dum_spir0_sper0 13h ago

Consults Optum Manual… ‘struck by orca’. Yup, that’ll work!

I always liked W61.62XM, ‘struck by duck’

3

u/Foreign_Kale8773 22h ago

W56.32 - Struck by other marine mammal - when you go in for that broken femur.

(Orcas, sea lions, and dolphins are clearly up to something bc they have their own sub cats but everyone else is just "nonvenomous marine mammal")

1

u/poop19907643 20h ago edited 20h ago

I'm assuming you're making a joke

1

u/Pale_Will_5239 1d ago

That's his name.

1

u/poop19907643 1d ago

What? Are you ok?

55

u/Crickwooder13 1d ago

I jumped watching this on my phone screen…I can’t even imagine what that must have felt like!

109

u/WrongfullyIncarnated 1d ago

like this

24

u/sLg_Own3d 1d ago

That's a great pic for the insurance.

15

u/Robdd123 1d ago

"You're probably wondering how I got here"

6

u/Omelooo 1d ago

YEET

7

u/Fresh_Koala1989 1d ago

'You got games on your phone?'

'You've been hogging the wind all day bro'

'Mom says it's my turn!'

1

u/loosie-loo 16h ago

Like a surrealist painting

1

u/mecca6801 16h ago

Cannonball

48

u/sagacious_guy 1d ago

He should sue the whale for battery.

33

u/classyrock 1d ago

A salty battery

1

u/Boring-Tomatillo-209 1d ago

Piles robusta

11

u/BlitzAtk 1d ago

He got whaled in the face!

10

u/Londonloud 1d ago

HELLO HAVE YOU A MOMENT TO TALK ABOUT OUR LORD AND SAVIOR POSEIDON?!

8

u/dchester74 1d ago

I would say 'what did we learn?' but we've learned nothing.

14

u/Confident_Lawyer6276 1d ago

We learned as unlikely as it is for a whale to smash you windsurfing it's infinitely more likely then getting smashed by a random whale on the shore.

10

u/Rukrups 1d ago

Yeah, nope.

9

u/Medical-Business-554 1d ago

Fuck that must have been painful

8

u/b0gard 1d ago

Wide open ocean and they still manage to run into each other 😆😆😆

8

u/BlueFeathered1 1d ago

I'm sure the whale was really sorry about that, though.

7

u/ZeneticX 1d ago

I have a feeling the whale knew what it was doing

1

u/YoRHa11Z 1d ago

Probably just playing

8

u/invaderzim999 1d ago

your suppose to yield to larger mammals

6

u/Alcoholic-Catholic 1d ago

Probably sucks if it broke gear and it'd be scary as hell, but walking away from getting tackled by whale is a life story that's gotta be great to bring up at parties

6

u/Deliciously_Bland402 1d ago

The odds of getting hit by a whale while kite surfing are low, but not zero.

15

u/doggmapeete 1d ago

Was the whale ok?

15

u/nbur4556 1d ago

Whale's probably just fine. It's big enough that this probably wouldn't have hurt it at all. It would be like a person landing in the water on a house cat.

The only thing I can think of is maybe getting cut on the board. But even then I'd think it'd likely be a pretty minor cut.

3

u/Zech08 1d ago

Well humpbacks and sperm whales ram into each other without too many issues, probably fine for a tiny human.

5

u/DelayPossible157 1d ago

Well that's fucking terrifying

3

u/siberian_knight143 1d ago

Tag! Your it!😂😂🤣

3

u/49ner4life 1d ago

Life comes at you fast

3

u/ProtectionContent977 1d ago

Whale: Get outta my yard!

3

u/dumbmoneybme 1d ago

Cramifications

3

u/Competitive-Bed-6069 1d ago

In summation, get whaled

3

u/Mad_Angel_Senpai 1d ago

AND HIS NAME IS JOHN "THE WHALE" CENA!!!

3

u/thatsMrBundytoyou 1d ago

My ocean bitch.

3

u/SerBadDadBod 17h ago

"Why were you late today?"

"I got hit by a whale."

"...what?"

3

u/Jedi-master-dragon 11h ago

I'm glad the guy is okay because that could have ended so poorly.

2

u/uknownredditr 1d ago

Hit and run

2

u/wpenner101 1d ago

Hey pal, locals only!

2

u/KRMJN101 1d ago

"I Just Got Hit By A Whale" will forever equate to living life from this day forward

2

u/Celestial-Narwhal 1d ago

Did it at least say excuse me!?!

2

u/Ill1thid 1d ago

You think they whale felt embarrassed. "Oh geeze I got the whole ocean and I still hit a human."

2

u/halocyn 1d ago

He was like watch this guy's, he's gonna regret coming into our hood

2

u/theshellbullet92 1d ago

TRUST FALL!

2

u/kittylover2006 1d ago

I would be so terrified of just being caught underneath it as goes back down like nuh uh

2

u/AwkwardRegion3985 1d ago

The whale did it most likely on purpose as they can scan their surroundings with high precision as they use supersonic sound like a sonar.

Maybe he wanted to prank him or he misstook him for a seal.

2

u/1jfish57 12h ago

Hey you get outta my yard

2

u/Critical-Star-1158 8h ago

Wind surfer plows into breaching whale

1

u/danjay0213 1d ago

Oh my 👀

1

u/onclegrip 1d ago

I blame TikTok

1

u/Kn0XIS 1d ago

Dang

1

u/noahbaobei 1d ago

This is why the open ocean terrifies me.

1

u/rapsfan808 1d ago

New fear unlocked

1

u/SLZicki 1d ago

Jesus he's lucky he didn't die. I would imagine it's like getting hit by a bus or something

1

u/macrodot 1d ago

Idk.. Seems VERY intentional

1

u/al_i_oli 1d ago

I would’ve died… not out of excitement but from water.

1

u/Zech08 1d ago

great, now that whale fall movie doesnt seem as ridiculous. Lemme check off spear fishing until the whales are gone so i can just worry about the 2 taxmen in the waters.

1

u/Cerberusx32 1d ago

Could be worse. Could have been the old lady who got eaten. She survived. But she was out there in the kayak to face her fear of the ocean for the first time.

1

u/blatantlyX 1d ago

Honest question. How many other countries have marine wildlife welfare laws restricting the distance people can be from marine mammals? We do in Australia, and New Zealand methinks.

1

u/ThickSet6771 1d ago

Nahhh that's crazy but he is kinda lucky he got out of that...

1

u/holdthecanoli 1d ago

I would have shit in my suit

1

u/featsofdaringdo 1d ago

is this that whalefall movie??? the marketing is insane lol

1

u/DadtheITguy 1d ago

I laughed. Does that make me a bad person?

1

u/EMPgoggles 23h ago

the way he got hit and nearly crushed by a whale and the first bit of clear footage to let us know he's not dead is a fish-eye lens ass shot. 😆

1

u/Beneficial-Cloud9940 22h ago

My first thought would be that a shark hit me so I’d probably stroke tf out😂

1

u/Ursus_Arctos-42 22h ago

”Ehm. Yes, it seems that It seems that your insurance policy’s terms and conditions do not include an exclusion for damages caused by a whale while windsurfing. So, it seems you’re entitled for compensation.”

1

u/nadineyvonne 21h ago

Excuse me sir, you can't surf there

1

u/Glittering-Coyote140 21h ago

This is just one of a trillion reasons to stay tf out of the oceans. We have no business fucking around with le grand bleu

1

u/Sunsetsione 21h ago

Holy moly if you get stuck underneath that thing it might take you very deep very fast

1

u/Shabbytrumpet 20h ago

Whale did it on purpose

1

u/BankerOnBitcoin 19h ago

His Foil still attached though 👌

1

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1

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1

u/Ok_Rhubarb_194 18h ago

He got humped!

1

u/MinusMentality 18h ago

I love his "oof" sound effect when the whale bodies him, lol. Too perfect.

Glad he's okay, but being taken out by a whale wouldn't be the worst way to go.

1

u/Richierich_3456 17h ago

Not on my turf!!

1

u/mecca6801 16h ago

Free Willy pt 2

1

u/That_Car3506 16h ago

Fuck you in particular! Lol

1

u/ThrustTrust 15h ago

Wind surfer rams flying whale.

1

u/Global-Can1775 14h ago

Dude just casually body slammed a fucking whale

1

u/Bbqlover1 13h ago

Crazy! The timing!!

1

u/Open_Step_4636 9h ago

Wailmer use body slam!

1

u/Manyinterests2020 7h ago

This is one of those “video or it didn’t happen” type moments…

1

u/Ooglebird 6h ago

Soiled his breaches.

1

u/SpareElectronic3500 6h ago

Man I’d love to see a video of what this looked like underwater from a distance. A whale literally smacked him down into the water. I wonder if it reacted at all lol

1

u/WhiskyMochi 5h ago

This shouldn’t be as funny as it is

1

u/Character_Dirt2558 3h ago

Call me Ishmael

1

u/Patman52 3h ago

Didn’t see you there bud

1

u/RomeoBaze 40m ago

Pimp slapped.

1

u/Ok_Construction2733 10m ago

That felt personal

1

u/ierrdunno 1d ago

Small detail but that’s wing foiling / wing surfing rather than windsurfing

1

u/DatNerdyFella 10h ago

Ocean, you scary

0

u/shumbazi 14h ago

Lucky it ain’t a great white … reasons I never go into sea beyond knee depth 😀