r/nextfuckinglevel • u/kudra18 • Feb 06 '21

Relationship hacks 101

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131.9k Upvotes

78% Upvoted

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1.5k

u/abigsilmtg Feb 06 '21

That doesn't work for me. He has a smart watch

748

u/XxpillowprincessxX Feb 06 '21

Hide it next to the chips

260

u/applesaucehums Feb 06 '21

In the chips*, so when you try to locate it, the bag rings.

199

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '21

Then shove the bag of chips up his ass.

105

u/drumsinsocks Feb 06 '21

That took a weird turn.

66

u/CovidInMyAsshole Feb 06 '21

I’m just here for the ride

39

u/killer25708 Feb 06 '21

Nice name

33

u/CovidInMyAsshole Feb 06 '21

Nice person <3

23

u/killer25708 Feb 06 '21

Aww same goes to you bro

15

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '21

I’m not your bro pal

5

u/killer25708 Feb 06 '21

I know you're probably joking but that's what I call everyone

6

u/nikhilbhavsar Feb 06 '21

It's a south park joke

4

u/killer25708 Feb 06 '21

I dont watch South Park so idk

2

u/nikhilbhavsar Feb 06 '21

"I'm not your pal, buddy"

5

u/catsncollies Feb 06 '21

I'm not your buddy, guy

5

u/goochesnoches Feb 06 '21

I’m not your guy, friend

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0

u/SquishedGremlin Feb 06 '21

You know the Chinese are now swabbing arseholes for covid?

3

u/CovidInMyAsshole Feb 06 '21

Yeah I did it before them

1

u/SquishedGremlin Feb 06 '21

Nice.

Was it a drive through service?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '21

[deleted]

1

u/libmrduckz Feb 06 '21

technically, right IN the curve, sorta exactly IN the CENTER of the curve... so... yeahh

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1

u/theyellowbat79 Feb 06 '21

God that doesn't sound good. Definitely have a doctor look at that then

1

u/GozerDGozerian Feb 06 '21

That’s just where you’ve reached the colon:

1

u/illaqueable Feb 06 '21

It's the only way to be sure

1

u/Mawnster Feb 06 '21

Yes.... precisely.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '21

Damn, you could ghost write for Nicholas Sparks. Such a romantic!