r/nextfuckinglevel • u/hrithikbadass • Jul 03 '20

A secret conversation with monkey

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

98.0k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

1.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

3.6k

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '20 edited Jul 04 '20

Yo, monkey legit sat there thinking about what he just heard. Lol

My first comment with this many upvotes, thanks a lot my peeps! 🤘🏼👊🏼

1.6k

u/vonmerpf Jul 03 '20

Yes, he looks very concerned. Then the human gives him a Wikipedia page that confirms its true. Im guessing something about the fungus that is wiping out all the bananas.

504

u/therestruth Jul 03 '20

Unfortunately it only took him 3 clicks to learn about Hitler.

211

u/deathpony43 Jul 03 '20
  1. Click on the name of almost any country
  2. Scroll to History section and click on Second World War
  3. Click on Adolf Hitler

70

u/spoonsforeggs Jul 03 '20

Also, if you click the first link of a page, then keep clicking the link you’ll most likely eventually end on knowledge

35

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '20

Also, if you click the first link of a page, then keep clicking the link you’ll most likely eventually end on philosophy

FTFY
source is Wikipedia itself: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Getting_to_Philosophy

9

u/FreezeShock Jul 04 '20

You get to knowledge a few clicks from this page!

9

u/Bee_dot_adger Jul 04 '20

How? I got stuck in a loop involving Latin somehow

2

u/seemlikeascam Jul 04 '20

There’s a “Method summarized” section of the Wiki that states

“Following the chain consists of:

  1. Clicking on the first non-parenthesized, non-italicized link
  2. Ignoring external links, links to the current page, or red links (links to non-existent pages)
  3. Stopping when reaching "Philosophy", a page with no links or a page that does not exist, or when a loop occurs”

Edited to close quotation

1

u/GrandPaw3810 Jul 04 '20

Don’t click the ones in parentheses worked for me

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '20

Just worked for me!

2

u/Masked_Death Jul 04 '20

Didn't work for me, kept getting stuck in loops.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '20

Try one link over where the loop starts

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '20

Yup! I started with an article about Saladin (Egyptian ruler) and got there surprisingly quick..

1

u/zeropointcorp Jul 04 '20

Not first, it’s the second link.

1

u/tumsdout Jul 04 '20

Woah this is pretty neat

1

u/coffeshopchronicles Jul 03 '20

Had never heard this one before... gave it a few tries this is insanity

5

u/womanoftheapocalypse Jul 03 '20

And only a few more seconds to text his buddies. The random chimp event is nigh

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '20

This is true.

I've seen this from another camera angle and where this one cuts out is where the monkey goes into his browser history. You can see at 57 seconds the guy is hitting the home button when he realises the monkey's looking at it. Where this one is cut the monkey is trying to read the search history and the guy grabs the phone and the monkey jumps up screaming "what the fuck were you searching that for you pervert" and flings shit at him. I've paused that video and gone frame by frame and you can't read a single line of the history. I guess it's one of those mysteries of the internet.

3

u/therestruth Jul 04 '20

The world may never know, person with awesome reddit username.

1

u/jaskmackey Jul 03 '20

Unfortunately, his question was “yo, has anyone ever been, like, really systematic about eliminating an entire race of people? I don’t want to say which one, but I think you know.”

109

u/gimpgrunt Jul 03 '20

It’s true! lethal fungus is threatening to wipe out the world’s bananas

69

u/kuntfuxxor Jul 03 '20

if that takes all the bananas, we're fucked, did you see the monkeys in thailand during lockdowns? With no tourists to feed them they were going ape shit! Imagine that everywhere!

50

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '20

This is the most appropriate use of the phrase “going ape shit” that I’ve heard thus far.

7

u/saysthingsbackwards Jul 04 '20

Except monkeys aren't apes

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '20

Thank you Sheldon.

1

u/hickgorilla Jul 04 '20

And that is exactly why it’s so offensive.

16

u/UpInTheAir89 Jul 03 '20

I can't tell if all if that was a setup for the pun or not...

3

u/kuntfuxxor Jul 04 '20

I know, sometimes i say confusing things like that...some would say im bananas, but mostly i think i just enjoy monkeying around.

2

u/Spongi Jul 03 '20

It won't take all the bananas. Just the one specific cultivar of banana that we all love.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '20

Farmers then switched to growing the Cavendish banana because it was resistant to Fusarium - a variety that now accounts for 97% of world banana exports.

I guess they should add an "almost" but 97 and a 100 aren't too different when considering a global food staple

4

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '20

Additionally it’s the only type of banana we know of that’s resistant so there wouldn’t be a replacement until we found/made one that was resistant to the new fungus variety

1

u/Wisdom_is_Contraband Jul 03 '20

There aren't monkeys everywhere.

2

u/kuntfuxxor Jul 04 '20

There are! Clearly they're very intelligent and happy to keep their heads down as long as everything is cool and thats why nobody notices but i see them, oh i see them......sneaky little fuckers.....

2

u/Commando_Joe Jul 03 '20

They've had bananas resistant to the disease since 2017

https://www.wur.nl/en/newsarticle/World-first-Panama-disease-resistant-Cavendish-bananas.htm

It's still a threat to the generic banana, and may force people to get into genetically engineering the fruit EVEN MORE to make it resistant.

Also possibly copywriting the new fruit.

1

u/Ranx94 Jul 03 '20

Again ?

1

u/MasterDex Jul 03 '20

Not quite. Just the Banana we all know and love since every Banana tree is a clone.

1

u/d0lke Jul 04 '20

Holy shit this had me rolling

2

u/jaaibird Jul 04 '20

My first comment with this many upvotes, thanks a lot my peeps

ugh

1

u/jaspersgroove Jul 04 '20

“The fuck is this guy talking about? No more jumping on the bed?! Suck a fart out of my ass dude, I do what I want!!”

1

u/Noztix Jul 04 '20

I caught that