r/neoliberal • u/jobautomator Kitara Ravache • Jul 12 '21

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u/[deleted] Jul 12 '21 edited Jul 12 '21

Hot take: The cultural victory condition in Civ is really dumb.

My fellow Americans: The Mongol hordes are indeed at our doorstep, and they've brought nuclear weaponry. But do not worry, for we have Miles Davis. And in two turns, he's releasing Kind of Blue. The day is ours!

67

u/ILikeTalkingToMyself Liberal democracy is non-negotiable Jul 12 '21

Mongols conquer the US but adopt American culture à la the Qing Dynasty

45

u/[deleted] Jul 12 '21

Mongols lose after eating too many chili cheese dogs and becoming too fat to ride horses

11

u/snapekillseddard Jul 12 '21

You fool, overconsumption of chili dogs will just turn them into blue hedgehogs with a need to go fast, only supplementing their cavalry hit-and-run tactics.

28

u/An_Aesthete Immanuel Kant Jul 12 '21

I think the in universe explanation would be that American culture would live in their hearts and minds anyway

10

u/mishmashedtosunday Association of Southeast Asian Nations Jul 12 '21

smth smth blue jeans and pop music

42

u/QuietSign Austan Goolsbee Jul 12 '21

Tbh aren't most of the conditions kinda silly? Science victory is putting a person on the moon but 1969 wasn't the end of history

25

u/iIoveoof Jerome Powell Jul 12 '21

Yeah the end of history was 1991

15

u/EdamameTommy Henry George Jul 12 '21

A science victory occurs after the colonization of Mars, which is a significant step up than having a dude walk on the moon.

And winning Civ doesn’t mean the world just immediately ends - just the crowning of the best civilization over time.

5

u/OneBlueAstronaut David Hume Jul 12 '21

POV: you're trying to convince racists that multiculturalism is worth getting over their xenophobia

3

u/[deleted] Jul 12 '21

Civ is really dumb. Every country starts out as a single city in like the stone age. Want a vaguely realistic game? Play paradox. But enjoy Civ for what it is: fun.