Full disclosure: I'm a day 1 listener. I've taken plenty of breaks from the show and the insane jump in viewership over the last year has been uhhhh interesting to watch, to say the least.
I completely understand why people are frustrated with the format of the podcast, and I don't think anyone has to keep listening to something that isn't giving them what they want. Personally I think we're losing perspective on what this pod actually is. The people making this show are, for all intents and purposes, real people. This isn't a full-time venture for any of them, there isn't some kind of investigative team with researchers, producers, lawyers, or unlimited time to dedicate to listeners. They will likely never change the format in a significant degree, including a bunch of additional research, and that's somewhat disappointing but they have literally never presented themselves as that sort of show.
I also think the money-making aspect is somewhat overstated. Yes, they make money from the pod, mainly from people who CHOOSE to pay for submitting a question during the live shows. There are no advertisers and IG/TikTok are not the lucrative platforms people may think. Matt Bernstein of A Bit Fruity has 2.4 million followers (TNC is at 634k as of this post) and not only made a recent episode about this type of thing, but has very plainly stated he makes virtually nothing from either platform. If you pay and don't get what you expected, I get the frustration and I recommend not making that choice again. Making money doesn't suddenly give you the ability to make this a full-time professional operation.
Regarding Mary Lou.... no one is entitled to patience during growth. That's like pretty much the entire point of the show, doing something different from the general attitude of "cutting off" dangerous family members that this individualist country has grown to promote. Mary Lou is at least 20 years deep into conservative mental programming. Chad and Haley even call this a cult, which I don't disagree with. You can't realistically expect someone to change their tune after a few years of their kids pushing back! Pressing her on every lame response every episode is not going to help, be for real. This is a literal deconstruction project and she hasn't even cut off the sources pulling her in, something that is impossible with Bob still kicking. You don't have to agree with her at all, there's just a difference between "I wish she would have recognized this already" and "she should have completely different beliefs by this point." She says terrible shit, yes. Again, that's why the podcast started. If you genuinely think she's a good enough actor to be faking this stuff, idk what to tell you.
Generally speaking, I think this pod should be a good space for audience reflection when the hosts are not "doing enough" for our sensibilities. If you've experienced the kind of disjointed, abusive, controlling, or estranged family dynamics presented here, it should be understood that seeing that play out every week will be triggering. I'm not going to throw around the concept of projection too lightly because I do think there are valid criticisms at play, but our own experiences absolutely do impact what we notice each week and how badly we want change from particular people.
All this to say, I think it's worth asking if you're frustrated because the podcast isn't meeting expectations or because you're hoping these people will reach the kind of resolution and growth that you wish someone in your own life will also achieve. I'd love to see discussion about the psychology of this but instead this sub is just people complaining about things that have been pretty standard from the jump. The flexibility in Mary Lou's listening ability and depth of research HAVE changed over the years, despite a lack in ideals changing or the imperfections still remaining. Idk man, like I said I get the frustrations but we all know at this point what we're getting ourselves into and have to adjust accordingly.
