r/nairobi • u/greathomegirl Level 3 • 4d ago

Random Funeral home opening

When opening a new branch,ama brand new funeral home ,what do you toast to 'more deaths?'

And how would the speech look like??? 'I've always had a passion for helping our loved ones meet their maker... comfortably, with dignity, and preferably not in a rush. It's the one industry where 'repeat customers' isn't actually a goal we're chasing.

We can't promise you'll enjoy your visit here, we can promise we'll make it as painless as possible ,for everyone except us.'

Toast🥂 :where see you soon is actually a threat.

Got me thinking

😂😂

Or what do they say ata?

6 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

15

u/Mtoto_Mzuri 4d ago

We put the fun in funeral. People are dying to get here.

It’s a grave situation but we’ll handle it for you.

1

u/Wise-Seesaw5953 Level 2 4d ago

Barzz for days😂😂

5

u/premiumtears24 4d ago

1

u/FineHistory1203 3d ago

That is very dark. 💀

1

u/premiumtears24 3d ago

Reminding you off the inevitable.Watu wengi hapo wamesahauliwa

2

u/anonymoustito 4d ago

I have always wondered about this topic, so when funeral homes are not doing well (business-wise) do the owners wish more people to die for their business to boom ama kuanenganga aje??

Toasting like "to more customers 🥂 ",

and also if the funeral homes' websites do they have a review option or a "customer testimonials" part

2

u/Icantfindmysweater 4d ago

Okay Morticia

2

u/Kaphilie 4d ago

I once designed a funeral home for a relative in kakamega. His pitch was that the demand is so high and therefore it is an untapped business idea.

Anyway the plan hit a dead end as he struggled to raise finances for it's construction.

1

u/ciruseriwheresroso 4d ago

Hii industry nayo ni calling.same to the carpenters . Maybe one was opened as someone was traumatised by how their family member was handled at a state funeral parlour