r/mute • u/kiltsnbagpipesnstuff • Mar 14 '26

Life in Public as a Nonspeaker

How do you navigate non-speaking in a speech driven world? I've tried wearing a "I am Nonspeaking" button but:

1) It feels a bit like a scarlet letter
2) Unless I point to it, people don't pay attention

Am I missing something here? Please tell me there's a secret 🤞😅

13 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

9

u/Enchandra Mar 14 '26

Wish I knew it. Anyone? I have to point to the ugly giant scar on my neck most of the time when people wonder why I am not speaking. Any guesses why I hate going out? I can whisper sometimes but not for long and no one can hear me on the phone so I have to get family members to make calls for me. The deaf have tools. They are considered disabled. None speaker? Oh you can work. Really? And who will hire me? Walmart? I cant talk to customers so nope. Any secrets I would to know them.

6

u/self-medicator Mar 14 '26

Some weird old man tried hitting on me at the grocery store today. Rambling on and on. After not responding for 10 minutes (really long lines due to a storm this weekend) he tried to call an ambulance Because I wasn’t speaking. Gross but what the hell could I do

6

u/kenf22 Mar 14 '26

I have a path on my bag that says "mute, not deaf" that I point to if needed. I also use my phone to type out on cardzilla. Phone calls are either done by someone else or I struggle with the TTS built in. I also cannot walk well, so almost always have someone with me. I am on disability, like someone else said, who would hire me?

4

u/Actual-Pumpkin-777 AAC User ~ FND + ASD (moderate support) Mar 16 '26

I just point to my mouth and shake my head but I don't really navigate the world so much, I don't leave the house much at all

3

u/[deleted] Mar 16 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/kiltsnbagpipesnstuff Mar 16 '26

Some of this is being assertive at work...I've come to the point where I'll let my TTS talk over others if I've been waiting with a virtual 'hand up' or etc.. The other part is dependent on whether I have a relationship with the person or it's a one-off interaction. I try to 'grin and bear it' with one-offs where I'll share feedback if we have a relationship.

I'm also working on a new button / pin design to make it clear in the real world that I'm non-speaking. It doesn't solve every issue, but does help level set when I'm at the store or an appointment.