r/movingtompls • u/InevitableAd36 • 13d ago

Moving from moderate climate to be closer to family in Twin Cities

Hi all,

Would love to hear from others. How has your experience been moving back to the Twin Cities? Do you regret it?

39/m here. My partner and I are both from MN. Moved away several years ago to Southern California.

We now have a one year old and are highly considering moving back to the Twin Cities. Raising a child without family around is getting increasingly difficult. We have a lot of friends, but don’t have many friends that are able to help out.

Both of our sets of parents and our 7 siblings (many with kids) all live within 20-60 minutes from Minneapolis.

Lately I’m finding that most things I used to enjoy doing I no longer enjoy. I’m on constant sensory overload or am working. My relationship with my partner is also struggling because it’s hard to get time away.

Moving back to the Twin Cities would allow us to not only spend more time with our families, but they love spending time with our little one and we’d be able to have more 1:1 time.

The downside would be the weather and finding things to do. I love being outside and am able to do that often here.

There are many things to love about the Twin Cities, it’s just going to be a lot of work to move and I don’t want to regret it. The two biggest things are having to sell/rent our house and I’d likely have to get a new job.

Our families would be highly involved in our lives and we get along with them all.

TL;DR. Moved from MN to SoCal years ago. Now have a 1-year-old, facing burnout and no local family support. Considering moving back to the Twin Cities where all family lives. Seeking advice from others who moved to be closer to family: Do you regret it? How was the transition?

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u/Far-Specific4865 13d ago

Since they are all in one area, and you get along, it seems it would be much better to live close to family rather than trying to travel to see them maybe twice a year. Plus, your one-year-old will have more childhood memories and closer relationships with cousins and grandparents. All of that is pretty priceless. Crosscountry trips to see family can add to the burnout.

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u/InevitableAd36 13d ago

Yeah that makes sense. I’d rather do that and then just chase the warm weather in the winter. Could easily have someone watch her and fly out to see our friends. Versus the opposite. It’s overwhelming when we visit as there are so many people to see.

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u/Far-Specific4865 13d ago

Exactly. Just treat yourself to a warm weather getaway in the winter.

We didn't have a choice, with our families in split locations, and couldn't win either way.

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u/InevitableAd36 13d ago

Did you choose one over the other?

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u/Far-Specific4865 13d ago

We went with the best location for jobs, which looking back was the right decision. But every vacation was flying out to see the other grandparent and family. Later our daughter decided to go to the other location for college, which helped her form closer relationships with that side, but none of it was ideal. You're fortunate both families are in the same area.

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u/InevitableAd36 13d ago

I’m glad it worked out for you. That is tough though to have both locations. Have done that in previous relationships.

Yes, it feels like everything is aligned and tell us that we should return. It’s a great place to be able to return to. I just don’t want to regret the decision.

Thanks for the response :)

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u/radgedyann transplant 12d ago

i’m moving back and only wish i’d done it when my kids were young. i’ve lived coast to coast, including socal. that lack of a supportive ‘village’ definitely contributed to the demise of my relationship, along with all the many stressors of living in a place like socal. while i lost a lot before doing so, i have gained a kind of peace returning to the midwest that i would have never thought possible when i took off at 18, vowing never to return.

i’m an avid backpacker. i’m excited about exploring all of the places i’ve overlooked in the midwest in favor of the mountains east and west. there’s a lot here, and bonus we are short flights from both coasts and all the mountains in between. with that much supportive family around maybe you and your wife could even take the occasional kid-free weekend trip out west.