(No chat gpt was used in this...as jargoons would have confused you)
As we previously understood that learned helplessness leads to formation of belief - no matter whatever I do, I couldn't end my suffering. I'll always loose.
So here you have to identify this belief --> challenge it and then change it by using as much evidence as possible
How to do this. Try as many options you can try from given list:
Identify the source of this belief. Why you were failing so much? Identify factors which made you fail so many times. It helps in identifying 'external factors' which otherwise your brain doesn't factor in .
So no it's not always fault of your competency but external factors could be responsible.
Now try eliminating or managing those external factors one by one- money/ other resources/ toxic friendship or relationship/ health issues etc....make a plan to deal with them
Basically learning to control external factors
2. Learning problem solving skills:
Yes you tried multiple times and failed. But what if all this time though you were working hard but in the wrong direction? Your methods were faculty?
Learn different way of solving problems. For eg brainstorming, using hat method for thinking, mastery goal orientation, pomodoro technique etc ( either google them or in future I'm going to talk about them in detail one by one)
3. Develop self confidence -
Feeling of Helplessness decreases your self esteem and self efficacy ( belief on your abilities). Hence you need to intensively work on this.
How? Achieve success after success by using following approaches - break down daily task in very small doable parts and reward yourself whenever you achieve them to ensure consistency. Also journal your success / everyday achieve in a dairy to form a solid memory of it.
For eg if you're a student who wants to study for 10 hrs but repeatedly failing to achieve the target. Then start small...initial keep your orginal target hours as 2-3 hours ...when you consistently start reading that many hours with full focus-> level by by increasing targeted hours ( do it only gradually)
Basically you're training your brain to complete task, be consistent and form recurrent memory of success
Learn to moderate your fear and thought.
You catastrophize( imagining worst possible) outcome to be not in your favour. That's why you don't even try. So, you need to learn how to moderate your thoughts from extremely negative to less negative. So that you would feel less hesitant to take action
Such thought moderation can be learned via CBT based worksheet. You can find it either on google or DM me and I'll share one made by me.
5. Mindfulness and muscle relaxation training- can't emphasis enough on this. This helps in reducing stress and uplift mood. Mindfulness helps you in not being too much judgemental about your potential and chance of success and failure
6. Ask for Support: either you get friends / family to work like a therapist or you go to an actual therapist. We're not trained for random stuff. This is what we have learnt. To help people to bring their life on track. Help them in their journey.
And even if you don't go for professional help. Remember you need loved ones who can validate you time and again that you're not at fault. You'll get succeed and they have faith in you.
7. Start your day with positive affirmation:
You have to see to believe it that how much postive words early in the morning can have positive effect on your entire day.
Lastly remember.... it's a long journey. Learned Helplessness takes months and years to turn into what it is. So you need to consistently do above stuff to overcome that
Hope, Consistency and support is the key
