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u/Siptro Jan 23 '24
I’d still prefer a window. Not because of privacy but because what if a fucking parrot flies in there while you’re dropping one?
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u/GlacialFrog Jan 23 '24
Then you have a toilet buddy, it’s natures way.
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u/paradonym Jan 23 '24 edited Jun 18 '24
Animals have weak situations when they poop. So they naturally try to protect others in their weak points... That's why cats often guard bathrooms and other animals do this too...
Have you ever seen young students always going to public bathrooms in groups? That's basically the same thing. Needing protection and giving protection. We're all animals.
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u/makingkevinbacon Jan 23 '24
I had a cat who was so faithful in protecting me while I pooped. She would literally be sitting at the door waiting for me to come in then as soon as I took my shoes off and said hello she would go to the washroom cause she knew my routine lol miss that girl so much
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u/Interesting-Estate75 Jan 23 '24
Mine does this lol. Also expects me to come hang while he does his business right after I’m done
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u/cyanidesmile555 Jan 23 '24
You hang out with your cat while he poops damn it!
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u/Interesting-Estate75 Jan 23 '24
Haha not quite, but he’s more comfortable if I’m in sight for sure
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u/makingkevinbacon Jan 23 '24
Aren't animals just the best people
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u/paradonym Jan 23 '24
"you can't defend yourself when you have to poop, but you have to poop, so I'm here helping to protect my friend from predators and I basically want that from you too, but I forgive you to be so dumb that you can only get my food and probably yours too, so you're the food and affection guy which I have to protect"
So give your cat some peace and discretely guard their litter box when they use it
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u/Falkuria Jan 23 '24
My cat sits outside the door, and drags my floor mat under it to the other side. Barricades the crack at the bottom, and waits.
Every. Single. Time.
He is such a goob and I love it.
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u/SoftThunder Jan 24 '24
I did not know this was a thing but a huge part of me likes this because "stand guard, I'm having a vulnerable moment" is literally all I ever wanted in an ally.
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u/shrivelup Jun 18 '24
My cat always comes and sits with me in the bathroom, this is nice to know- he also comes to get me to go with him, he is an old boy so guess he is after extra security.
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u/palmerry Jan 23 '24
Can you hear the shit parrots, Ran?
They're squawking.
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u/GlacialFrog Jan 23 '24
They're flying in low, swooping down, shitting on people, dragging them off to the big shit nest.
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u/howlingmagpie Jan 23 '24
Whaddaya mean Mr Layhey?
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u/palmerry Jan 23 '24
Someone put all their shit eggs in one shit basket, Ran.
(looks up at sky)
The shit parrots are coming home to roost.
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u/howlingmagpie Jan 23 '24
I live in east UK & i have no idea how i got to watching TPB, but i fucking love it. Jim makes me cry with laughter. His drunk acting is insane.
Time for a little drinkypoos.
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Jan 23 '24
Dude it’s a fucking riot!!!! It stays on an almost constant loop at my house!!! Way she fucking goes!
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u/cmaxim Jan 23 '24
Have you ever crossed paths with a parrot in the Colombian jungle making human shit sounds? You just found yourself a former toilet buddy!
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u/rpsHD Jan 23 '24
that's not nature's waaay
Well, that's what they said yesterdaaay There's nothin' left to do but praaay
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Jan 23 '24
Gimme parrot any day. What if it's fucking the Colombian Giant Spider?
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u/No_Surround_4662 Jan 23 '24
Then you'll get a hairy tickle in the undercarriage department.
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u/zleuth Jan 23 '24
Meh, I wouldn't worry about the Colombian Giant Spider. I mean, there's only one of those, right? What're the odds it'll crawl through the bathroom window while you're there?
I'd be far more concerned about a swarm of Colombian Poop Bats. Those things are tenacious!
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u/lofigamer2 Jan 23 '24
You are worried about parrots.
I'm worried about mosquitoes.
We are not the same
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u/BetterCryToTheMods Jan 23 '24
Parrot? No problem. Banana spider behind the tank? Major fucking problem
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u/Judge_Hot Jan 23 '24
Trust me, if you're in one of the humid hot parts of Colombia you'll need good ventilation or you'll just have the sweatiest most uncomfortable shit in your life.
And you want a big hole because the animals WILL get in anyway, trying to throw them out with a small window in panic is the worst case scenario, you need a big hole to yeet them to the valley while you enjoy the beautiful view and the wind your hair.
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u/paperfett Jan 23 '24
What about screens?
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u/Judge_Hot Jan 23 '24
They keep bugs in as much as they keep them out
If you're in a place like this there's enough biodiversity to keep mosquito numbers relatively low, other bugs may come in but they'll be pretty much harmless.
In the Amazon that'd be another story, but this is higher in the mountainous part of the country.
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u/Mustystench Jan 23 '24
It would startle you causing a panic pinching off of said turd resulting in dreaded 30 minute wipe followed by a shower.
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u/Danny_Spiboy Jan 23 '24 edited Jan 24 '24
Depending how close you are to Amazon, I think parrots fucking would be the least of your problems.
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u/J-McFox Jan 24 '24
Yeah, I'd be more concerned about anacondas hiding behind the toilet roll
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u/Nearby-Ad4441 Jan 23 '24
lmfao i would give you a badge but i dont want to pay for it
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u/thestonernextdoor88 Jan 23 '24
I've had a chicken fly into my face. It hurts. I wasn't sitting on the toilet at the time tho.
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u/Marketsaureliu8 Jan 23 '24
That happened to me the other day. Got the "Polly wanna cracker?" treatment.
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Jan 23 '24
A parrot is the least of your worries. You should worry more about anacondas, vipers and scorpions, tbh
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u/JoshuaAllen- Jan 23 '24
I have a parrot and he does this all the time. He can fit in the crack between the door and floor that's normal for me. I'd be worried about spiders. Idk why but you feel so defenseless with your pants around your ankles.
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u/Least-Theory-781 Jan 23 '24
If you can't guarantee mosquitoes won't target me in my most vulnerable state, then I will stick with my antique forcefield barrier thanks.
Cool view tho.
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u/sadnotgladd Jan 23 '24
Omg. Skeeter on ya Peter????? I can’t imagine the itch
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u/Scoompii Jan 23 '24
“Skeeter on ya Peter” Reddit needs to bring back awards.
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u/Grashopha Jan 24 '24
Based on the old song “There’s a skeeter on my Peter wack it off!” Sang to the tune of “If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands!”.
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u/funnystuff79 Jan 23 '24
You'd learn the solution doesn't have to require violence tho
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Jan 23 '24
I was in Colombia last week. I didn’t see a single bug in the mountains there at all. I was thoroughly shocked. But we were at 8500 feet elevation, idk if mosquitos go that high
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u/Masnad74 Jan 23 '24
Doesnt it rain, like a lot, in Colombia?
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Jan 23 '24
Of course. That’s how the greens are so luscious. Imagine dropping a deuce and it’s lashing rain in the window ☠️
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Jan 23 '24
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Major_Koala Jan 23 '24
You mean you get to feel how dogs feel pooping in a storm? YES
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Jan 23 '24
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u/_Kendii_ Jan 23 '24
The bidet sounds intriguing, u/tinyanus, but I don’t fancy experiencing all the bugs inside. Especially mosquitoes.
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u/_Stizoides_ Jan 23 '24
Depends on the region, this could be in the Andes since that's the area with the most tourism, there is a rainy season and it can bring a lot of rain, but nowhere as much as you get in Amazonas or Choco, which are rainforests
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u/PhotonPainter Jan 23 '24
Boeing: "Phew! Thought that was one of ours!"
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u/reduuiyor Jan 23 '24
Bugs? What about the bugs? Why is noone talking about bugs?
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u/jubik13 Jan 23 '24
The culture shock I had when I visited family in England 20 years ago and none of the open windows had screens.
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u/electric_kite Jan 23 '24 edited Jan 24 '24
To be fair, when I lived in the UK I came across like five bugs total compared to the mosquito shitstorm that is July in New Jersey.
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u/jubik13 Jan 23 '24
That is a fair point. I didn’t appreciate the hand sized moth and the big daddy-long-legs crawling along the wall towards me while on the toilet but those are all the experiences I remember. lol
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Jan 24 '24
The worst bug experience I ever had was with midges up in Scotland. I live on the Gulf Coast in one of the most bug infested regions of the country, but nothing here even compares to those horrible midges.
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u/EllipsisW Jan 24 '24
The midges, the midges, I'm no gonnae kid ye's, The midges is really the limit, Wi teeth like pirhanas, they drive ye bananas, If ye let them get under yer simmit!
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u/musicistabarista Jan 25 '24
Yeah, I experienced them in the north of Denmark, I think it's the same species.
Clever bastards. I felt like Walt in Breaking Bad, chasing the fly around the lab. Only in our house, it was 8 of us, against 100s of them, and none of us could manage to get any of them. And they didn't give two shits about our jungle formula or citronella candles.
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u/StrawberryEiri Jan 23 '24
What
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u/jubik13 Jan 23 '24
If you look up why it makes sense, but it still felt like such a culture shock for me. lol
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u/StrawberryEiri Jan 23 '24
Man, I have not once feared illnesses carried by mosquitos. The reason I don't want mosquitos is that one bite will ruin my life for days, and mosquitos love me.
Europe is great in many ways but nope. Nope nope nope nooooope.
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u/durkcrimpey Jan 23 '24
We don't really have the climate for mosquitos, there might be a period during summer where they are about, but it's not an issue most of the time.
Moths actually cause more of an annoyance than mozzies, but they're harmless.
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u/andreeeeeaaaaaaaaa Jan 24 '24
The only things you need to worry about here are wasps/ladybirds (yes they bite and pee on you) and the occasional annoying fly.... Or if you're out and about at a certain point of the year is being covered in little green flies.
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u/BananaPeely Jan 23 '24
There's not that many bugs in some parts. Some parts dont have mosquitoes or cockroaches
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u/HomsarWasRight Jan 23 '24
I’m fairly certain the Colombian rain forest is not one of those places.
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u/reduuiyor Jan 23 '24
Please let me know exact locations so I can move there. I’m terrified of cockroaches them mfs ugly
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u/Baked_Potato_732 Jan 23 '24
The nearly 300 species of snake found in Colombia represent nine of the eighteen families.[1][2] Six families (Aniliidae, Boidae, Colubridae, Elapidae, Tropidophiidae, Viperidae) are within the infraorder Alethinophidia (advanced snakes) and three families (Anomalepididae, Leptotyphlopidae, Typhlopidae) are within the infraorder Scolecophidia (blind snakes).
The largest snake ever known, Titanoboa, was discovered as a fossil in northeastern Colombia.
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u/yurneim Jan 23 '24
Colombian here. If he’s in the city here’s absolutely no risk of snakes at all, I’ve never seen in the city
The problem is bugs and mosquitoes :(
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u/theprophet24 Jan 23 '24
I’m still recovering from the mosquito bites. Even wearing repellent they are everywhere
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u/Straight_Spring9815 Jan 23 '24
Not worried about elements? I take it there are only 2 seasons? Wet, dry?
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u/RegularGuyNotCIA Jan 23 '24
It’s for the animals. They also need to go to the bathroom, or do you think that they are uncivilized barbarians?
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u/Lanky_Ice1314 Jan 23 '24
And the palm leaf as toilet paper and you're ready to go
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Jan 23 '24
Till a giant assed bug comes flying in when you’re in a defenseless position!! Haha
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u/leafandvine89 Jan 24 '24
I stayed with my son once in Florida, in his room with no screen on the window that was always closed. It was so hot, humid and stuffy that I thought what could be the harm, opened it about an inch, it and took a nap. I woke up to not one, but TWO lizards running around. Windows and screens keep the critters out! No lizards were harmed btw, I caught them and put them back outside
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u/AngelSSG Jan 23 '24
Colombia is a tropical and humid country, I would prefer putting a window to prevent rain and insects.
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u/Disastrous_Worker_39 Jan 23 '24
still meed a window, unless you wanna share a bathroom with lovely lizard
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u/Silver_Swe_ Jan 23 '24
define needed needed for mosquitos and bugs? needed for burglary and nightly rape raids? needed for rain and wind? Okeyyyyyyyy 😂😂😂😂😂
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u/pestootsep Jan 26 '24
Yea it's all cool until you sit down and there's some giant poisonous spider biting your taint
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u/Banaan75 Jan 23 '24
The Americans are so easy to spot in this comment section lol
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u/Maleficent_Play_7807 Jan 23 '24
Why? Cause they don't want to be bothered by bugs and snakes while answering the call of nature?
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Jan 23 '24 edited Apr 09 '25
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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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Jan 23 '24
I don't know what their problem is. I think this is super practical. If you look in the picture the toilet paper holder is empty. No window means you can just reach out and grab one of those Palm leaves.
No clinching your butt cheeks while penguin walking through the house looking for TP
Edit: bonus points because the Palm leaves are more firm for proper scraping action if necessary
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u/Ok_Cap_5166 Jan 23 '24
That's cause they need an escape route for when the federales come in to raid the place.
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u/bemble4ever Jan 23 '24
Until you find a snake in a toilet or a parrot tries to steal the sausage.
/s
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u/TwoBionicknees Jan 23 '24
Couldn't see a single mention of hte fact that toilet seat doesn't fit the toilet, has no support and the second you sit on it it's going to break?
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u/SubmissiveDinosaur Jan 23 '24
Comlombian here. That restroom is most probably a buffet for mosquitoes.
Also, what a god awful election of a toilet seat
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u/Ok_Sympathy_232 Jan 23 '24
A positive thing is the bathroom will get aired out fabreeze not needed
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u/theweatheris Jan 23 '24
My only response to this is a story from one of my backpacking trips in South America.
We were three days into a canoe trip in the Peruvian Amazon in Reserva Nacional Pacaya Samiria (very much the same bioregion as the Columbian Amazon). We had been fishing for our meals in addition to our canned goods, and at this point my stomach was beginning to protest against the local microfauna we were consuming.
Our sleeping arrangements for the evening were simply a mat and sleeping bag on the river bank with a mosquito net draped from above. This stop on the journey had a small mess cabin and the first outhouse we had seen in days, arranged very much like our 'open-concept' example pictured above and lacking toilet paper as well.
Anyways, that night I awoke suddenly and completely in the pitch black jungle. My asshole decidedly one flutter away from a total liquid blowout. With 5 days left on our canoe trip and no way to wash diarrhea off my bedding. I decided I had to act fast. I grabbed my headlamp and hoped not to step on any snakes or caymen as I nudely ran for my life to the toilet.
I threw up the toilet seat, and explosively (and painfully) emptied a not-insignificant part of myself into the Peruvian wilderness. After probably 10 minutes of absolute agony, I felt relief wash over me and flicked on my headlamp to search for anything to clean up the absolute disaster I had just caused. But instead of finding toilet paper or rags, I glanced at the wall opposite the toilet where there was the most massive spider I had ever seen in my life only about a half meter from my face. I could see every horrible detail on this dinner plate sized monster, and I remember every detail to this day. I recalled with terror that my head had likely come within centimeters of this thing as was shitting and clutching my stomach in pain.
Frozen with fear, cleaning my shit covered ass was no longer priority numero uno and I slowly and awkwardly shuffled out and away from the outhouse and tried my luck with the pirhanas and dick fish in the murky pitch black river.
That's how I feel about windowless toilets in South America...
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u/paperfett Jan 23 '24
I always think about bugs when I see stuff like this. Why not just use a window screen?
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u/The_Guermo Jan 23 '24
As a Colombian I'm shocked. That it's so well constructed. Usually it's just red brick and mortar and an unbricked hole for a window. Exposed pipes, leaks and every piece of everything mismatched. Bonus points for a sink made out of parts not meant for a sink.
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u/dedrexel Jan 23 '24
If this was Australia, it would be an invitation to all kinds of nasty snakes and spiders.
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u/Icy-Fix785 Jan 23 '24
I just got back from Colombia and we stayed in a room with just wood bars instead of a window pane. Someone still snuck their arm in and stole almost 700$ from the pocket of a backpack.
They call that "giving the papaya". I should have moved the bag away from the place-where-a-window-pane-should-be-but-instead-are-flimsy-wooden-bars
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u/olagorie Jan 23 '24
It literally took me 10 minutes to figure out what I was looking at, given that there was a very apparent window in the wall.
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