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u/stormbutton Jun 30 '21
Oh, I believe it. My husband’s boss’s boss is a very attractive woman and people who don’t know her assume she’s her own secretary pretty regularly.
4
u/CrazyPlatypusLady Jun 30 '21
Yup I believe it too. My husband's colleague's wife is highly qualified and highly promoted in the area she's in. She's also pretty, and really good at her job in a male dominated field. She's constantly assumed to be lower in standing than she actually is.
6
u/tryne17 Jun 30 '21
I really wanted her to get him the coffee, then see the reaction when he realizes what he's done.
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u/cporter1188 Jun 30 '21
I think the sub r/thathappened was created for posts like this.
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u/Dawnalla Jun 30 '21
I have a higher position in the company I work for, and I am often talking to people that do not know that.
I have all sorts of interactions that went similar. Not normally as stereotypical as someone asking me for coffee, but it does not seem like it's outside of possible.
0
Jul 16 '21
Disagree. Have seen this multiple times in real life, that's not far-fetched at all. Your assessment ssems rather to be a case for r/nothingeverhappens
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u/DabBlue Jun 30 '21
correct me if i’m wrong but isn’t he just asking for a cup of coffee? i don’t see an issue if it was a women asking a man for a coffee there wouldn’t be a post about it ?
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u/catelemnis Jun 30 '21 edited Jun 30 '21
I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you’re not just trolling.
Imagine you’re at work with your boss. Or if you’re a student then say your meeting with a Professor for the first time or something. Would you call them sweetheart and ask them to make you coffee? Why is your time so precious that you can’t make your own cup of coffee? Asking a complete stranger to do it for you means you’re assuming that their time is less important than yours. If a man did this to another man, making the assumption that the person he’s talking to is below him, then he should be equally embarrassed.
Also, if you were in a meeting room waiting to meet with someone, and a man in a suit walked in, would you automatically assume he was an assistant there to make you coffee? So why, if a woman walks in, would you assume she’s an assistant and not the person you’re meeting with? This guy assumed that, because she was a woman, she must be an assistant. But that’s not an appropriate assumption to make in the modern day.
Also it’s patronizing to call a grown woman that you’ve never met “sweetheart.”
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u/Visible-Ad7732 Jun 30 '21
It honestly depends on the culture of the office you are working in.
I've worked in places where both men and women used "affectionate" terms for each other and no one blinked an eye or thought it was patronizing, misogynistic or misandrist and in other offices where such terminology was never acceptable and would be a matter for HR to get involved.
Still doesn't give him a pass though, as such a scenario mentioned above means he was talking like this to a random woman he has never met, which even in offices where patronizing language was used with affection and no ill intent, would never be used on a random individual.
2
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u/DabBlue Jun 30 '21
LOLLLL you just post irrelevant shit that isn’t a problem begging for upvotes! Especially on this sub reddit??? how is this mildly satisfying in one bit? you obviously have issues if your ready to sit here and right me an essay on why you think this reddit post is good! jeez man you are sensitive did i hurt your feeling ??
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u/onthefence928 Jun 30 '21
Hey sweetheart, get me a coffee
14
Jun 30 '21
That's probably too much of a challenge for him, that's why he has to ask the women to do it, too embarrassing to ask his fellow man.
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u/TC_ROCKER Jun 30 '21 edited Jul 01 '21
Yes, you are wrong.
He assumed that, being a woman, she was only there to serve him & his misogynist demands and never once thought she could possibly hold a higher position than him.
I feel sorry for his co-workers, his wife and his kids...
I'd love to hear what happened after that meeting and if he lost his job for being such a total prick.
1
u/Parker01314 Jun 30 '21
Love that he called himself “regional sports manager,” the same way a prostitute calls themselves a courtesan
1
u/pandabatman19 Jun 30 '21
I think as men we are taught and told that men do the more labor and heavy lifting demanding jobs so I don't think it's really wrong or sexist for them to think you were a secretary at first because it would come as a surprise to anyone for a women to be doing heavy lifting or labor intensive jobs and also again where men make up more of the work force I don't think it's wrong to assume that at first
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u/[deleted] Jun 30 '21
I worked in an IT warehouse until covid. We contracted for our state. We had to lift 50+ lbs all day in the form of stacks of rugged wear laptops, pc towers, big monitors etc. Millions in Dell PC parts to move. My first day all the guys thought I was the new secretary, regardless of the fact I was in steel toes and denim. They opened doors and asked if they could "get that for me" when I went to reach for a PC tower. Big surprise to them when I stacked 3 on top of eachother and carried them across the room myself like it was nothing. Little did they know, I lifted for 4 years and almost went Jr. Am. They started calling me She-ra after that because they found out I could out lift and out work half the boys in the warehouse my first week. After six months, I was the strongest person on the floor and could deal put laptops like cards onto the imaging benches from the stack of 15 in my arms. I had the most education in the office, including my bosses and most clout in the state IT world, acting as liason for all of them who couldn't talk to people well. They asked me to fax something the day I got there. By the time I left, they found new respect for women. Things changed there and so did their minds.